If people are rooting for and edging on certain people to go silly, the answer is usually that other people would be more suited in that role. They didn't succeed in glorifying one person, so it would seem. Things happen that tell me no.
What's so great about going too cross-eyed and getting one too many orgasms.. I don't want my eyes closer and closer. It's not really a straight path.
I just keep getting teased and taunted by the people experimenting on me partly, like they have to do it like it comes out naturally. What that means is I'm in trouble or something is wrong with me. True, I'm not much and something's wrong with me. I feel I've been in disturbing situations. I didn't want to get on anyone's bad side, and I have sorta interrupted privacy that might cause me to malfunction and I get in trouble and get pressured a lot.
I should just sit here like a Dali Llama and predict the future, what I knew would happen. I just have these feelings. I knew there would be some issue made up to do with people related to me.
I had "things" going for me! I just had this weird vision. I have strange feelings about the future. I was recently surprised to encounter someone'e race.
I always thought younger people from earlier in history has more later on felt more babylike feelings. I don't know if it's a number or what. Did I not have something going? Maybe, some people want to do things I don't want to do. About people in history, I think they felt a lot cuz I see the pictures of them cuddling and sometimes nude with a mother or maybe maid.
You know, before the Presidential Election we didn't have this very problem, except for some things maybe. If someone needed something before, they should have gotten it. I know some people don't get what they need or want people to leave them alone, like me..
I don't know if humans are all they're cracked up to be. Pretend to expect too much and it might cause an unwind or something. I don't want to see my world fall from under me! It doesn't have to happen. I wasn't talking about real people, just things in general. It's a mistake to give up and forget the past.
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There's nothing for me to be interested in cuz everyone is programmed to think a certain way about me and to treat me a certain way. I do want to help people, but people don't seek me out for assistance. I have my own life, too, and goals to be an attractive human. I believe in talent and money. I don't want to experience not being accepted in some way because people ratted me out in lies! I just get ignored, tho it's funny there's no one there to ignore me it feels. I know people out there are interested in me. I just feel bad when I could have met someone and I get in trouble and I don't have it good with anyone and can't find anyone but can't be alone in a good way, neither. I like the people experimenting on me, but I just have my regular world issues. Why did people know so much about someone I looked up to connected to me? Before, it was about me! Do you think the people I look up to are just babies to molest? I already feel it's a crime how people treat me. I've called the police non-emergency, several times. I hate being treated like I did something wrong, too, like right now. I might call the police about how I feel about things, now. You know, I didn't hear that people appreciate what's going on. That means they were unsuccessful at their supposed intentions. You know, why are the experimenters mad when I talk about this? Since when would someone feeling good elicit so much jealousy or pain from me of some things? This person is not mean. I'm not being sarcastic, just saying why would all of a sudden someone feel good cause pain to someone else? Why? Look, I don't know who or what. You probably don't care cuz I'm talking a lot, but I got this idea, and I got upset inside. I mean, could you do the same thing to someone bad or is it just this person I look up to being reduced to an infantile status? Yup, you heard what I said. It's there in black and white, there in English. I want everyone to feel as good as they should. Yup, you heard that, too! I'm not for the superstition of honeymoon times for everyone all the time that I am supposed to shut up while people are mean to me by distracting my relationships, like we're vulnerable and it's set and they are on a rampage of extra energy from older age. What the Hell is this superstition about me? I just don't want to be framed about relationships and stuff. I don't know the problem. I haven't been able to attain focus. I heard other people feel more and differently from me, depending on things like age and generation. So, what, people I look up to are just teenagers to me but parents to younger people? I mean, nothing should be wrong, tho. So, basically I'm just here to report another horror for a young person about things they had in the world. I'd rather "rape" and prove someone who fits the bill that they're not all that. I think the person I look up to was kidnapped and they pretend they can stimulate them in amazing ways. It would affect them, tho. I'm not mad at them, tho, so I don't know what to think. I feel like they died or something, like I have also in ways I dislike but thru different means. Did you know pleasure does die down in ways or some? What do you think about psychiatric pills? My parents make me take them or I hit the streets, like they've told me a multitude of times. People thought that was something that is to freak over.
I don't know how to solve my petrification. Why don't people care about people they look up to? Maybe, people aren't all that. They just like to wrong the right. What can I do? I don't just forget about things. Why are people so drugged out, in general?
Why can't I understand? That person would be there for me if it weren't for this. Aha! There it is in black and white! I don't trust people. I'm the best person in the universe!
You know, I was kinda told that this wouldn't happen, but it doesn't matter, pleasure for someone else and horror for me. So, forget that it doesn't happen maybe for me. It happened. I don't know what to do. It's like I just died again. Okay, I don't know for sure what happened, but I got upset and that's what happened. I just had an idea. I'm not wanting to be upset at anyone nor blame anyone involved. Maybe, you could calmly "blame" people experimenting on me, but I don't want an upset.
People are telling me I am bad and saying other people are better than me now. They are ruining my relationships because of their jealousy of things that just make them upset.
I feel I've been told I don't deserve what I got and to go off because I'm writing what I'm going thru and to not feel the pleasure I wanted.
The people involved experimenting on me won't stop trying to stimulate the person I look up to in a bad way. They said the person has to be for someone else. They just dumped that on me after this long rant to break off the readers's concentration and make my writing shit to them. I am not bad, and they are stealing from my relationship. They said someone I like pressed the button that said to somehow hypnotize me from someone I look up to being for someone else instead just cuz they felt like it. Why do that to the person I look up to, trying to test them not to like me. They still think I'm bad and stealing someone hypnotically in a stimulating way that's bad because of something that they have a problem with. I wouldn't mind it, but they said they are hypnotizing me to do this and keep me off like I'm some danger and lose something for yet another day. What do you think about that? They are just suddenly worried it would come up and decided to do it. I am not gonna fight, and apparently they won't stop acting Autistic. I thought I was the one who was labeled with Autism. I'm not, tho, duh. Lotta people would understand me. I already feel bad about me saying I dislike the need to state I need to be hypnotized like some animal in that someone is doing wha tI said that something bad could happen to me. They keep saying other people are important and finding ways to hurt me in a message to do with them. I can't trust anyone. Everyone seems to be upset at me because I cursed on my blog about the hurtful, illegal noises Ellen DeGeneres supposedly put in my room for a long time. Anyway, I thought they made a claim that this was good for me, and now they are changing. I knew it. That's what I said. I was unfriended by someone on Facebook, like I'm bad and did something, but I didn't. They just act like that. A car outside talked about death of someone I look up to because I didn't like their joke about how I would be hypnotized, like some tool. So what? I just said it. They are not being nice after I posted about what bothered me. No, it is not right. I always see people revealing that others are bad, and whatever this is where something worse is coming up from others is really bad. What is this?
Who can I talk to? People are all so mean up in my face.
Why are people rattled about what I talked about? They just set me off. What do you think I said this for?
Supposedly, someone I look up to, the cars outside say, is with someone else insteada me like I'm the bad guy and forgotten.