Showertime

Yikes!  ;o

Sad

I wish I coulda otherwise politely ignore that which I do not know how to respond.  I understood different forces at play.  There, that's what I wish, and it's sorta what I did except with an upset feeling attached.

It's funny how the big thing is that it's to be against me.

I don't need a lesson in being humble.  Just because I was praised for being good.  Life has turned into a nightmare for no apparent reason.

When they rub it in, they try to hit a nerve each time.

Problems

So, why are you acting like only someone else deserves "a special moment?"  Is it tacky?  I hope you don't make it tacky.  No, I will not listen to that you think I should be punished.  Why is rubbing it in to me a part of something critical like that to you?

Upset

I don't like my dad getting in the middle of my problems.  He isn't even supposed to know me, anymore.  Not that that's exactly what I'm looking to do.

I don't live to unravel

meaningless messages like this.

You're all rubbing in

something to me in a mean way.  I am nicer than other people and more accepting.  You chose to be rude to me.  Fine!

I cannot forgive this.

You think it'll either all change or won't, which is why.

And

as said before I am not speaking to any 1 person.

I ALSO HAD SAID

I just didn't like the way my mom sent the message, tho I might have to disagree tho I like to say I both agree and disdain because of the hate..

I know it was an edging on like it was to be my decision to say no and go.

Didn't I say

something like not to tell me I'm bad?

What about

the saying you hate me using critical things like this??

If anyone cares to know

I do like other people to get attention and not me.  I just need some sometimes.  I know that people are trying to make me feel unimportant using someone else getting attention like follow the leader and that I'm in trouble and they can't be.  I don't really mind.  I am sorry, but this morning they said it in a way that just rubbed in like sin.

So, they let some girls enjoy life looking thin and "typical" .. beautiful .. but not for me!

All you obese people out there

If you were overweight for a significant portion of life, I know how exciting it can seem once you finally feel what it's like to be really slender and alive.

Feeling Bad

I didn't altogether mean to end my video on a bad note saying what my dad does.  You know we texted and now he used a graphic smilie, instead.

Respect for Real Relationships

I am not just oh wow I'll meet all the people such and such doesn't like in their lives rather than that I liked them themselves cuza a bunch of lying.

Website Update

Life Problems

My extended family and probably others think I myself am a mistake because my dad left a note for his mom before he went to marry my mom.

It's not dishonest yet considerate

to think about how you treat someone before seeing them, like you have to prepare.

This

my blog

I am not disrespectful, but I am not a goody good.

I'm not talking to anyone specific.. Yeesh!

How can anyone who lives in LA get mad?  That's bad.

Taunted Twice at a Time from Tonight to Today

When they brought up that thing where I'm in trouble like every day and deserve nothing, it happened before bed and after waking.

Talking on IMDb

If ya'll look up to Pennsylvania as a higher power that be, you're wrong, tho they are smart and normal.

Being a Goody Good

I find it perverted to say I can't sing for the reasons you'd say it.  Like, I don't respect nor submit to some higher power there be.  Like I don't mess around thinking about what it is not to be a hard-working "musician."  Like just saying I'm not the right person and didn't get all the private training I desired when I was young.  That includes college, not just my poor parents where I can only take ballet etc.  I mean no harm by the word "perverted."  It just fits.  I don't mean it about anyone but about doing/thinking this.  I don't mean it to any one person.

You know..

..I don't know why people even started being mean to me.  It's unimportant.

So..

It seems people are saying I figured out and remembered all this stuff and no one stopped me so I deserve everything.  Like, emotional situations that shouldn't be.

Reveling in Anger

I might not agree with someone but do not wish a fight.

IMDb - The Soapbox (cont.)

Are these girls exquisite?

Bella Thorne + Chloe Grace Moretz

They don't get told they are bad, like me.  People are racist to me.

Bella Thorne

Chloe Grace Moretz

I used to be like them, but people thought I was too predicted in looks.

Problem

I just won't take people letting me know I'm bad.  Why listen to my dad?

Asians

Some of them just want to look Asian to find a reason to hurt mixed Asian/whites..

Elders

All they do sometimes is waggle and drop by and leave a mess on you, a competent adult who never had much of a childhood in a childlike way.  It went by.  It's a desire today.

Cancer

Just because my mom has cancer, does not mean I need to be submissive and get it, too.

"Throwing Away My Life"

You usually counsel youth against doing this, but you are doing this to me, "ehe he.."

What's wrong, tho?

You just don't like this.

I know when something is wrong, true, but I didn't say that.  I didn't say anything.  I just didn't want to do it.  How am I supposed to juggle those thoughts all the time at snap command?  I will only give a simple answer then.

This isn't out of place to say.

I think people are trying to k*** my parents with their health issues.

Hm

This sure is a lot of stress for something unimportant.

What?

You think I'll submit to anyone I like for attention??

WHAT IS YOUR PROBLEM?

YOU DON'T WANT ME TO HAVE A SUCCESSFUL RELATIONSHIP?

Problem

I'm not gonna sit here and be your secretary of insults to me.

Now, my mom is being tacky saying I can't have a relationship with someone..

Problem

They are chasing away anyone who wants to talk to me.  Don't even say I did anything.

I do something funny.

I live with my parents, but I'm on meds unless I leave just because of the N word thing.

Why?

How amazing can anyone even be to wanna meet?

I don't necessarily wanna waste my life on a TV show

but don't wanna on college tho that's what I wanted the time to do yet don't even drive now.

Jackie Evancho

I wonder if she is still pumping up before age 16/adult.

I mean, she had such strong arms.

Problem

They made a weird noise on my recording when I messed up from not having the words.  You know, just a supposed glitch.

Problem

These people are sitting here telling me I did things I didn't and saying someone doesn't approve of me just sitting here innocently online.

Website Update

Complaints

No one sits there and controls how the page loads on my computer just to send a secret message constantly while I spend time online doing serious things.

Something Important

No one wastes their life on me, but I might waste my life.

New Videos of Me Talking

I figured it out.

It's not age.  People will always treat us unfairly compared to girls born in 1997-1998.

TV

Do you depend on the TV?  Or do you like freedom?

New Picture of Me

Imgur

What can I say?

These adults in my life are not perfect.

As for letting them talk to others, I mean I won't sit here and say I force you to listen to me.  I just think it's wrong to put someone in my place, and I ain't afraid.  It would be wrong to do to anyone.

OK, now that I can sit down and get something across, why talk to someone?  What about how many people you talk to?  What about why?  Is it just to annoy someone?  Fine.

Singing

I can hold out and sing a long time, like not droop in the middle of a song.

Website Update

Complaints

Someone/some people keep rubbing in someone over other people like all I know is this 1 person.  They do it using annoying noises.

Why does this even matter?  People used to leave me alone.

No Fuss No Muss

I got up and came out and had breakfast this morning/afternoon.  I just made videos talking about it.

So, my mom said something about this person who's being used to follow me in all the things I do in an annoying way.  I didn't want to listen and just didn't really agree about the annoying actual way.  She did it again later and I wanted to be left alone.

Also, what's up with this me in trouble never answering just doing like?  I am the one who is always nice.  I just don't take this kind of treatment.  It's literally getting in my way.

cont.

racism

Dr. Phil

I submitted another response to get on the show.

Nite Soon

New Recording of Me Singing

A Loony Answer

to parents's problems

Do you really care that it's about yourself and think your kids won't take after your SO (significant other?)

I might seem rude

if I don't wanna be with you.

A Misunderstanding

It is never right to k*** a person, unless you make up some crazy circumstance or crime.

Problem

Why are people telling me I am like my dad to impress me in ways I don't like?

Problem

They made it so I associate an emoticon on IMDb with something disgusting.  They are spamming unwanted messages.

Please don't

make my dad mad in unnecessary ways.

Also, I act good for an old-fashioned generation why don't you like me?

So, guess what I watch on TV?

cartoons and now about animals in Asia

Problem

I'm being flooded with insults and weird things being said.

I almost forgot.

I guess that's Ellen and Dr. Phil.  They just happen to be on TV ever' weekday and I dream how they read my blog or would know about me.

I haven't found "that special someone.."

who is any much older than me.  Why am I in trouble?  I was framed.

The Truth

Some people are interested in fighting with me and "protecting" others from me.

A Good Thing

It seems someone misinterpreted my true intentions.  More good things is still a good thing.  In no way does my life revolve around 1 thing.

I see.

You all hate me for my race and what my parents aren't like but I am.  I can't believe you.  You just wanna sit here and fight.

Problem

What are they even talking to me about?  Just insults.

IMDb - Johnny Depp

Re: Looked much better on Ellen

I thought he made a wonderful impression of himself in reality.

Does anyone approve of celebrities attacking normal people?

If something makes you mad, wouldn't you curse but not to hurt someone?

I guess it's a lie.  Being mean to me is not the only thing there is to do.

Ahh

I'm tired of Twinkies.. I can bake, but that's not what I want.. I want candy!

And

Who are you now?

Question

Who do you think I am?  Who are you making me talk to?

I want this to stop.

These people are mean to me.  It might be because of my dad.  They think they have to listen to him.  He must be still mad in secret.  It comes out, but his time with me is o so important.  Is it really productive, anymore?

Let's find out if it's just my dad?  I think not.  It's not some game whoever hurts me wins.

O

And you all got a beautiful young girl in trouble.

Ellen

I really was disappointed today.  I wanted to see them happy.  Johnny Depp was on.  I'm glad they were able to focus on some things of importance.  The girl was a nice person.  I don't understand why she's considered better than me or everyone else.  That's the 1 thing that was not nice, but there could be more.

The little girl seemed to have it together, that's for sure.  Proud of her.

I already asked my own private therapist.. what if Ellen saw I was upset at her on my blogs?  She just says no.  She put the noises in my room, I thought.  You can't expect anyone today to be sane.  I kept getting beat up called not white and stuff.  I didn't try to hurt her.  I was just cursing for fun.  Not at anyone.  She acts like people are so bad.  I can't do anything about what I feel.  It's a terrible inconvenience and like my life doesn't matter and like you can own it.