Sarah Silverman, a girl who likes to play basketball was really nice and good at basketball. When I play, the ball lobs a bit off if I back up far, but I'm pretty good medium close. I liked her hair, bangs parted to the side, a little long, black. She's real sweet and cool. She actually said she was the class clown. Ellen was, too. Yea, I remember people being like her. They might be out of line but otherwise seem sweet. Sometimes, I wish certain people would speak to me. I have also found when they are technically younger.
Morris Chestnut was a nice guy, too. He seemed to want to be in his A game. He was great at shooting the basketball from far away, I saw. He seemed very friendly. I wonder why these people aren't more self-centered. I know the guests who aren't famous can be the polar opposite of them.
I liked seeing the 2 guys who like Drew Brees from the New Orleans Saints. It is because one is paralyzed that they are helped on the show. They are very nice, interesting people to me. I don't know, but Drew is cool and from Texas. I remember the 1st time they were on I looked them up. I didn't connect all the way. There's a big thing about being from the South, like I not being from the country makes me more foreign. I think people have some accepted as who I am where I am from. So, it was cool seeing, especially since Ellen is from New Orleans and 2 years in Texas. I do feel a bit alienated by habit of being new there and somewhat vulnerable. I guess no one in my life as approached me about how to take things. I thought my dad would like to do that, seems more dangerous if my Gramma did but my dad didn't. I might be like her kids, then, who she expressed she thought were at least some bad. They have a different father, a different kind of person. You know, she did have a few miscarriages and her husband died young, maybe from drinking and smoking. Sometimes, I feel attacked like I'm bad and don't deserve to live and that she's trying to radar me. My gramma was very nice in my opinion, friendly compared to my dad in ways, sad to see her in old age. So, interesting.
Cat week. I liked the cat she showed following the turtle. Don't remember other cats. I wanted to get a cat this week, but anyway my room is not cat proof. I just realized too many chords, too. My clothes are on a shelf and I need new shelves. Maybe, I'll make them catproof. I might have to get rid of the cat if I got away. Not sure how good that is, but I am willing to buy a pre-owned cat. I love abused animals. They are so innocent-looking and still stand tall.
Wednesday, October 21, 2015
OK
I'm going to bed, but every time I do that I awaken to being in trouble. How pathetic. What'd I do to anyone? What do I think that's not allowed?
They're going to rile me up when I wake up and come out to eat.
They're going to rile me up when I wake up and come out to eat.
Problems
I'm kinda worried about what Ellen DeGeneres thinks about what I did. I just don't really want to take it. When I'm mad, I sometimes get confused and just hit my sofa/pillow. I kept looking at her, and she kept making angry expressions in my perception. I started out on a good note recently, but that doesn't matter. I used to curse about her being mean putting illegal hurtful noises in my room a long time ago.
What can I say? I thought I'd been nice. She was upset I was feeling neutral during her last episode or something. I think it was that I wasn't mad at others for what she did.
This is a goofy way of communicating.
It wasn't a nice thing to joke on me with, everyone, like I'm *beep*. What business do you have doing this? This requires an explanation. I just did.
You don't even have to pay attention to me.
I know people I encounter won't stop being mean to me.
I won't accept these other people who are trashing my life in what they say like I'm the one who ultimately did something. If I say someone was being mean, they are just meaner. The world doesn't care when you do this.
Constantly digging in my past telling me I'm worse than you is not something I'm gonna smile about, and I'm not joking around nor being disrespectfully sarcastic, just saying.
Other people wanna feel so triumphant like they're over me. I don't need to listen to that. Like, do it in public so you can get in trouble. I'm making it public right now cuz they all just keep doing that for some random reason. Just because someone is not emotionally perfect does not mean this is something you're gonna get away with. I need to make a Police post and tag as a warning.
I don't just go and hit things for no reason. They kept at me repetitively. Getting physical.
If I'm already mad, chances are I could get even madder.
I didn't mean to look at Ellen badly, but she kept looking to annoy me on TV. I'm the one in my room with the TV on. Can you explain what Ellen does? Let her at it, I didn't say she had to do it. I already want her to stop, but I guess it's up to her.
So, yea, I'm not here to submit to Ellen, but she doesn't have to do that for me.
I just wanna watch the show and post about it online. Other people can talk to her, too. I'm at home and can watch TV as of now.
Like I said, I didn't mean to hit the sofa in synchronization with her like it's at her. I guess it was irritating me or something, but it wasn't like unusually bad.
Sorry! Hate me if you want.
What can I say? I thought I'd been nice. She was upset I was feeling neutral during her last episode or something. I think it was that I wasn't mad at others for what she did.
This is a goofy way of communicating.
It wasn't a nice thing to joke on me with, everyone, like I'm *beep*. What business do you have doing this? This requires an explanation. I just did.
You don't even have to pay attention to me.
I know people I encounter won't stop being mean to me.
I won't accept these other people who are trashing my life in what they say like I'm the one who ultimately did something. If I say someone was being mean, they are just meaner. The world doesn't care when you do this.
Constantly digging in my past telling me I'm worse than you is not something I'm gonna smile about, and I'm not joking around nor being disrespectfully sarcastic, just saying.
Other people wanna feel so triumphant like they're over me. I don't need to listen to that. Like, do it in public so you can get in trouble. I'm making it public right now cuz they all just keep doing that for some random reason. Just because someone is not emotionally perfect does not mean this is something you're gonna get away with. I need to make a Police post and tag as a warning.
I don't just go and hit things for no reason. They kept at me repetitively. Getting physical.
If I'm already mad, chances are I could get even madder.
I didn't mean to look at Ellen badly, but she kept looking to annoy me on TV. I'm the one in my room with the TV on. Can you explain what Ellen does? Let her at it, I didn't say she had to do it. I already want her to stop, but I guess it's up to her.
So, yea, I'm not here to submit to Ellen, but she doesn't have to do that for me.
I just wanna watch the show and post about it online. Other people can talk to her, too. I'm at home and can watch TV as of now.
Like I said, I didn't mean to hit the sofa in synchronization with her like it's at her. I guess it was irritating me or something, but it wasn't like unusually bad.
Sorry! Hate me if you want.
Apology
It's funny, I'm watching Ellen DeGeneres on TV from my home. I am mad and hit my sofa/pillow, and she can do whatever she wants to me, as tho people do it to her.
I didn't mean to act like I was hitting to her, but it seemed to come up, like. Very sorry. I didn't really mean to do that. Hate me if you want.
But, yea, anyone can do whatever they want to me they think..
The world is such a bad influence.
What can I do? It's over, anyway.
I didn't mean to act like I was hitting to her, but it seemed to come up, like. Very sorry. I didn't really mean to do that. Hate me if you want.
But, yea, anyone can do whatever they want to me they think..
The world is such a bad influence.
What can I do? It's over, anyway.
Problem
They won't stop acting like someone I like is hating on me, the people experimenting on me, talking to me when I load the page at their will. It's pretty bad. Who does this?? They need to stop now.
Hating My Thoughts
People read my mind and snap at me for what I have to figure out. "Then," they say.
Multi-Racial Issue
It seems set that the winners are all Scandinavian/Finnish.
You think we're all gonna wait around with the false promise that we'll all make it, when it's locked up that no one Scandinavian/Finnish will get going?
You think we're all gonna wait around with the false promise that we'll all make it, when it's locked up that no one Scandinavian/Finnish will get going?
Problem
There's something wrong with these people watching me. I could tell from the beginning 10 years ago. I can feel them watching me as nothing comes to my mind.
Can I have a little help!
I'm not being forward, just posting on my blog, but do people really not care when concerning me what's important? like my family living with me?
Disclaimer: Not pointing any fingers nor trying to be offensive, etc.
Disclaimer: Not pointing any fingers nor trying to be offensive, etc.
Ehe he he - I'll make it this time.
I'm setting myself up to do Hollywood work for children.
•I might study children in college.
•I'm dying my hair red-blonde and cutting bangs.
•I might study children in college.
•I'm dying my hair red-blonde and cutting bangs.
Any other @TheEllenShow fans out there .. wanna be my friend?
I need help in understanding her. I like watching, but I feel like I'm bad.
— Christina Barrett (@ChristinaAnnJoB) October 21, 2015About Not Being in Trouble
It does seem my life is all about not being in trouble. I guess it's the adults's faults if they suddenly think my cousin's life is ruined. They are trying to judge us by who my dad is and who her mom is and make it worse because of the fact I'm mixed and she's how she is. They "see the result.." If I seem good, they think it's not true. They think my cousin was framed and that I need top worship her like I'm *beep*. I can't say anything technically about vacations and things without letting known that my aunts and uncle-in-law used to yell a lot at her. Her mom doesn't curse, but the other 2 did. Yes, she curses some or not sure how much really, too, but not at them probably. Most people curse, like, "Oh, shit!" Now, they secretly hated me. I was nice to her and played with her, but I don't think she cared, anymore, with the way everyone cares about her in front of me sometimes all of a sudden. They had to wait until I was old to do it and let me have my own life. They think my cousin's mom is the cutest and therefore any kids of the other 2 siblings must be s***, which means me. Can you help? I know I have an old bf who seems hooked on the idea that she is mean to me but that her parents aren't and that because of that her family is better and so is she for some reason, like my parents aren't that good cuz my mom is Asian.. Can you help? Thanks! Thanks for reading this.
So, disclaimer: Don't let thoughts wander in negative ways that are untrue. I mean no offense. I explained as I wrote. I don't want to be blamed for others's flubbing habits.
I just don't get if I was nice to her until we both fought for reasons I unfortunately forget.. and the adults were mean to her in my extended family, they all prance off and crazily claim it was me. They probably set me up.
I don't like how they slam in my face that I had underlying hatred which caused my existence to be an issue. I've done a lot for the image of this family.
So, disclaimer: Don't let thoughts wander in negative ways that are untrue. I mean no offense. I explained as I wrote. I don't want to be blamed for others's flubbing habits.
I just don't get if I was nice to her until we both fought for reasons I unfortunately forget.. and the adults were mean to her in my extended family, they all prance off and crazily claim it was me. They probably set me up.
I don't like how they slam in my face that I had underlying hatred which caused my existence to be an issue. I've done a lot for the image of this family.
Lost It
I think I have lost it with Ellen DeGeneres. She doesn't like me cuz I was so nice to her this season and she found ways to say I'm bad and mean to her. That's not true.
I don't think I'm on good terms with her. So, maybe you should look into her. I wonder why she would like me in ways. She thinks I'm such a problem that she can't get it and goes all out and pays attention to me. She seemed to say that today, and that doesn't make sense. She acts like a rebellious teen. I don't wanna be treated like this, like I'm too old to think of her like a mom. It's just sad. I'm not lashing out on this point.
I feel like it's a big danger to sanity etc.
She's just mad at me forever for cursing about the noises in my room each day for too long with no one helping nor saying to stop for some reason.
She got mad at me for something from the past. I can see if that's what she wants to do.. that's up to her. She doesn't have to do it, neither, cuz it's work, but it might be more interesting than doing some other things she might find herself doing.
I don't think I'm on good terms with her. So, maybe you should look into her. I wonder why she would like me in ways. She thinks I'm such a problem that she can't get it and goes all out and pays attention to me. She seemed to say that today, and that doesn't make sense. She acts like a rebellious teen. I don't wanna be treated like this, like I'm too old to think of her like a mom. It's just sad. I'm not lashing out on this point.
I feel like it's a big danger to sanity etc.
She's just mad at me forever for cursing about the noises in my room each day for too long with no one helping nor saying to stop for some reason.
She got mad at me for something from the past. I can see if that's what she wants to do.. that's up to her. She doesn't have to do it, neither, cuz it's work, but it might be more interesting than doing some other things she might find herself doing.
Nationalities
I saw that English/European people can make people behave. I know that it's something different from Americans, but we should fix that.
Question
Do I need to be sorry for hitting my sofa to release stress in private? I know a lotta people don't really go thru what I do, racism. It seems I'm surrounded by negative jokes but nothing really bad happening. Help? I guess most people go thru. I guess I don't "need" anything they have to offer.
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