Thursday, September 17, 2015
I wonder if I ruined my life before age 5..
..I remember I just wanted to do a little gymnastics, not ballet, but later singing. And told my mom I didn't want the swim lessons at 2 cuz they let me go in water, kicking to stay up.
A Uniting Point
Well, I don't think people'd wanna..
..White people generally are fairer. Spanish people from America a long time ago for some reason are dark. I don't know if they like it when they're with fair people.
..White people generally are fairer. Spanish people from America a long time ago for some reason are dark. I don't know if they like it when they're with fair people.
Where do you spring from?
I see people in Europe, they be accepting the lowest of the low! in the US!
OK - a point
Why is me not being fair like I like desired and promoted to make other races being vicious happy? I may not be a Viking, but that's not nice.
It's strange..
..I made a subconscious decision to go on saying other races are okay, but they aren't as in they feel bad. Maybe, I shouldn't have bottled anything up? How can I deal with this? It has been suggested because someone is part Latino I should not talk about it when it has come up. I talk about things when they come up, so it's a little hard to figure out. It actually came up before, today. That was not liked, neither, I am getting. You know, I don't think anyone really had a problem after I said all this. (?)
In the end..
In the end, it will be realized that being mean to me like babies in a playpen is wrong.
Wondering
I feel I should shut up.. but I don't know about what's past. I almost posted something really stupid, I know..
This needs to stop.
Bella Thorne keeps on coming up every time I try to think to someone else. You'd argue she's a good one. Most people are their own person. I am interested in her as a person, but this? I wish I could find more people. I can see people not caring if I live my life, with people all laughing at me demonically. ..the people experimenting on me doing whatever the H*** they want to me.
Race
Why are there so many people who don't know what they're doing about race and having it affect my life?
I'm just white like anyone. I don't need this.
I'm just white like anyone. I don't need this.
Interesting
The little boy thinks his teenage sister is an adult. A little later, we see the mom making a black and white polka-dotted scarf for her. "Teenagers," the parents say.
Problem
I just come home and get depressed at the irritations from the experiment that happen. I just wanna walk straight to the sofa and wait for day.
Other Whites
Other whites get away with being white around other races but not me even being just part white and Asian.
It's true..
..they get in the way by annoying me. Like thinking they can discipline me. Whoops.. I like them, too. I just feel like people don't understand I am part white! It's true, we know if we have bad blood if it's white that it still is a good thing just giving the white traits.
I know how this goes..
..you don't say I don't wanna be white.. you acknowledge the unfairness done to me.
What's with all these people..
..following someone supposedly good and acting like I'm a n***** and they aren't because of it?
Problem
I'm tired of being stupidly infamous. It just spread. I don't know who did it, if anyone coulda.
What Fools
I'm watching Access Hollywood.
Think of all these people who act like I don't know what it is to be white lashing out mindlessly unknowingly.
Think of all these people who act like I don't know what it is to be white lashing out mindlessly unknowingly.
The new overpopulated minority/ies..
Latinos and blacks
in the US
We wanna be blonde and fair.
It is a new majority, fact.
We respect any human, but something is strange here, we must admit. I think Hollywood is asleep with blacks and Latinos skating around changing everything.
Just accept me and respect me as a mix without saying I'm the biggest n*****.
in the US
We wanna be blonde and fair.
It is a new majority, fact.
We respect any human, but something is strange here, we must admit. I think Hollywood is asleep with blacks and Latinos skating around changing everything.
Just accept me and respect me as a mix without saying I'm the biggest n*****.
I have to say..
..it's been said that Bella Thorne is putting herself in others's faces when she doesn't live up to what she claims. Ellen seems to have caught that kind of thing today on her show. In Orlando, they believe to get attention you must be functional, accomplished, etc. They want someone with an admittedly versatile personality, look, etc., and with an attractive base look that they understand. Not that this all is a question to Bella. That's just what's going around, thanks so much for letting the cat out of the bag. The problem is when people are already in the process of getting attention, you can't break it for everyone, and you can't follow around and ruin it for me to dehumanize me. I honestly feel I have no one out there because of this experiment.
Problem
They are trying to be smart but cheap with me about race, like "suggesting" they ^know something^ all of a sudden.
I can't seem to enjoy my private thoughts if Bella Thorne finding out applies.
I can't seem to enjoy my private thoughts if Bella Thorne finding out applies.
Other Race's Racial Fetishes
I hate it when other people's racial fetishes get in the way of my life. I mean, I don't have a problem and they want to say I do more than others even of my technical races, which I did not grow up identifying with. Maybe, you're the one who thinks you're too good. Obviously, you don't understand alien races. When I identify with other races, it doesn't change who I like being. Point in check, I don't wanna be the one to put up with racial fetishes of others and something else I forget! like for instance when they act like I have a problem in suit of their having one, which I otherwise would not have, like it's important to their racial identity.
Crash Course Relatives
My relatives don't realize I have a life and think it's crash course relation time when I've always already had a healthy interest.. like, "Now, Christina is not in school, she can do anything and we can make fun of her cuz she's just a singer."
The Ellen DeGeneres Show
I remember the 1st person who came on, a stand up, was very smart.
There was a couple from Boston, a black man and tan Japanese woman who just had a baby. They were on because they posted a video of the mother dancing while pregnant before giving labor. They seemed pretty happy.
The guy from Scandal was very smart and nice.
I remember the girl who made the mechanical hand for people without fingers so they could grab things. She was very cute, straight blonde hair with highlights after the top part, 5th grade, probably Nordic.
Ellen seems to be doing good, as usual. She is extremely smart with people. She must get frustrated with people. ..It makes me wonder about myself. I forget what else I'd say.
There was a couple from Boston, a black man and tan Japanese woman who just had a baby. They were on because they posted a video of the mother dancing while pregnant before giving labor. They seemed pretty happy.
The guy from Scandal was very smart and nice.
I remember the girl who made the mechanical hand for people without fingers so they could grab things. She was very cute, straight blonde hair with highlights after the top part, 5th grade, probably Nordic.
Ellen seems to be doing good, as usual. She is extremely smart with people. She must get frustrated with people. ..It makes me wonder about myself. I forget what else I'd say.
It's fun to follow Bella cuz she dresses up and posts pictures every day. Does she ever have any free time to do nothing?
— Christina Barrett (@ChristinaAnnJB) September 17, 2015How Long I'd Stay
I can see myself necessitating 3 years. It's 4 years, and I have 1 year under my belt with 3, 4, or 5 instruments each semester.
Makes Sense to Me as an "American" Musician
All my ancestors weren't American..
..but to study something "different" I like like folk music and my desire for Nordic things.. it makes sense. It's what I'd be dootin' in America, anyway.
..but to study something "different" I like like folk music and my desire for Nordic things.. it makes sense. It's what I'd be dootin' in America, anyway.
Here
Did you know in college here where I went, not supposed to have a car maybe my 1st year, there was no way of getting to Wal-Mart?
Just Comparing Models to the US..
..It's been an awkward time orienting myself with slowly finding acceptance to this program.
I guess I'm still not old. I'm used to being teased by too much pleasure.
I dunno what I'd do here.. I was gonna do a Bachelor of Music in Performance with Elective Studies, and the Elective Studies would be a Ballet minor. That way, I'd do classical singing but not have to do opera.
I guess I'm still not old. I'm used to being teased by too much pleasure.
I dunno what I'd do here.. I was gonna do a Bachelor of Music in Performance with Elective Studies, and the Elective Studies would be a Ballet minor. That way, I'd do classical singing but not have to do opera.
Future Goals
I dunno.. I looked at a lot of things in the performing arts and arts. Performing music is certainly one of them. I think at the school I mentioned, they can play, sing, and compose. I think they also have to learn folk art.
When have you really made it?
I liked folk music when I was a kid, but as a small child I didn't have exposure. I was pretty good at walking and talking.
University of the Arts Helsinki - Sibelius Academy
I want to study folk music there. I just found out FAFSA, the US company of the government for financial aid.. there it participates. The school is free, but it's about $700/month for boarding and food. I apply in January for the next school year.
I only have 1 year of music here, so maybe I can graduate in 3 years? It's been a long time out of school, off and on.
This school has a Masters in Nordic Folk Music, too. Also, you don't have to speak Finnish. I want to get Pimsleur when I can afford it to learn Finnish partly by ear, via this.
I only have 1 year of music here, so maybe I can graduate in 3 years? It's been a long time out of school, off and on.
This school has a Masters in Nordic Folk Music, too. Also, you don't have to speak Finnish. I want to get Pimsleur when I can afford it to learn Finnish partly by ear, via this.
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Re: Naughty and Nice
Josephine Potter- "You used to be bitter and cynical too. You were far more interesting."