Twitter - Dr. Phil

@DrPhil I guess because of Charlie and the Chocolate Factory (2005) you are getting people who have overstepped into social sin.
— Christina Barrett (@Christina4333) January 22, 2015

Facebook - Dr. Phil

Tell them you will grow up and get outta the house via someone who loves you or college/community college.

Dr. Phil

They brought the same people as yesterday for this half.  It was fairly interesting, to me.  I think the 1st couple need more time apart.  The kids seem safe with the grandparents, in a way..

The 2nd group, I think the grandma needs more time alone and the daughter needs to take walks with her kid for her exercise.

Dr. Phil is a great guy and very smart, and that's why I chose to start watching him.

About What Happened

I really do feel a disagreement that I suffer variably for cursing about noises in my room cuz they hurt me and I disagreed with that monkey business.  No offense about the term "monkey."  I am sorry it's one of those things you think I said that you don't say but I don't think I was the one who admitted it.  I disclaimed you can do what you want and you don't have to give me attention.  I don't like when other people step in and tell people who like me not to talk to me.  I would talk about someone dumping me as who I am/to them.  That really is your choice, and I admit that's something I think now.  I just am upset about it, I'm saying.

Time

for shower then TV!

Worked Out

I feel thrown about.

I did treadmill and machines @ the gym.  Treadmill 30 minutes, had to stop for my dislocated foot/ankle.  Walked with my weights for over an hour.

Coat Stand

I'm getting this next month @ W-M: link.

$50

"Who" really matters?

Why would a person matter other than that they are not being tortured?

Website Update

Life Problems

I spent a lot of the money my parents gave me and used store cards.

No Relationships

It seems famous people have barged in and questioned the relationship between myself and people such as my Gramma.

Website Update

Trouble

The people in Orlando and who knows who else think I can't have the respect I earned if a little misunderstanding or conflict etc. happens concerning me.

Website Update

Trouble

My parents who live with me almost always seem to have an attitude and send me secret messages of hate.  They try to snap make me feel guilty about denying the validity of this and such.

Website Update

Life Problems

I was trapped in the house with nothing to do so started e-mailing family and friends.  They didn't answer, but I kept e-mailing.  Of course, the friends do no talk to me now.

Why?

would my dad dedicate something special to him like that?  No one will get the joke but me maybe.

Unhealthy Relationships

I wonder about that.

My Current Obsessions

I dunno, it was Dr. Phil and Ellen of course.  I wanna watch tonight.  What else.. I was singing and still do.

I like the jogging with weights.

Wah ah ah

I didn't get on Dr. Phil?  I have another idea, focusing more on how I don't wanna live alone and how my mom hypnotized the psychiatrist to keep me on meds that I have to take if I live here, which have side-effects like being tired too much and diabetes and perhaps the high cholesterol spikes, as well.  (Spike doesn't mean anything specific I know about.)  I do wanna live alone, but I want a career.  I was gonna move to Miami as a secretary, but they said no stay home and learn to live on your own.  I don't have the house clear and am tired on the meds.

So

What do you think of living the dream meeting famous people who are good at what they do, online, only to have them all hate me cuza my dad.  Why is he involved now since Nell Burton?  Like, he's always coughing up messages right and left.  It's a lie that he's totally innocent and like a sad puppy.  They keep changing that fact, and it ain't gonna blow over.

cont.

So, I could not seem to be calm about this, neither.

Beckoning

My dad is beckoning the buzz on a few nasty jokes.  I feel like sparks are flying in anger.  I could not believe when I was sent to schools that did a lotta busywork only to expect me to know how to succeed in college, later.  It's true, they emphasized it was about getting us out on our way as citizens and not criminals.

Problem

Ever' day my mom acts like there's something wrong with me a lot and my dad, too, of course.

Liars

I found out it's all just a big game to tease me with past attention.

It's also a lie that someone is cool with me.  They brought attenteion to others over me and stopped liking me.  They are hurting others who are nice.

Well, then

I will talk about it.  Generally.

Relationships

If someone doesn't wanna have any relationship to me is fine.  I just don't like that it's for such a reason to have a bad one.

Problems

I just found my dad picked a name for a website that made it sound like I'd need to pee if I talked about personalty, which I learned young.  It could mean  a compliment, but I don't believe it.  He had a certain negative air about himself.  I was probably like 15 or 16.  He made another name after a "mistake" in my life, too.

Upset/Unaccepting/Not Understanding

I don't accept others who make others not have a relationship or have a bad one on point of little things that go wrong when people attack me with their attitude.

Stuff

I guess I was complaining, tho.  I can try to refine this.

Might go back to bed or eat 1st.

Tired Still

Been Sleeping

Sore

Nappy Bye

Misinterpretation

I didn't say I wanted to lash out at anyone specifically.

IMDb - The Soapbox

Re: I fell asleep at 9 :30 due to Fatigue

Yea, I've been up late watching TV/jogging.. wonder if I should reverse that. Want a nap now. Today I have 2 Ellen shows to watch. I also am watching Phil. It's not working out so great, but I like them. It's like I should stop watching just to watch, like 2 is a lot. An hour each show. Adds up. 

Vaguely in Trouble

All of a sudden people get mad, and it's like what I didn't do anything.  People can literally get on their high horse.

Dad

Don't like how he thinks what I do affects who he is seen as.

Trick

You think all the compensations mean something good to ice the devil's cake.

Cheap

If you have to think I'm bad to have a successful relationship.  That's just all made up!  Little things do happen, but they were not bad things.

You think there's compensation in this "project" or game.  You can't just be happy to meet me.  What's so good about that?

cont.

Duh---

Why do you keep pretending I'm talking to specific people?

Really?

What did people say about me that makes you rightfully dislike me?

Apology?

Do you need one?

I was upset about myself last night.  I'm tired, wonder what I should do.

Problem

I don't have the full online experience with these people watching me, controlling when they want the page to load or the internet connectivity to change.

Bed

I may go back to it.  I have 1 show to catch up on (Ellen, yesterday.)

I did m********* last night but don't do it heavily.  If I do it less, seems I have less problems, at least not all bad like if I did it more.

Problems

I want privacy from my dad, but it seems people I like who are famous have secretly met him.

I've learned to ignore the signs.  The people watching me privately in my room have been at me this morning.  I know I don't hafta listen.  I am legal and appropriate and good and nice.  I'm not gonna be charged as some random criminal.  What about all the other people in the world?  Would that work out?  No..  Kids'd get sick in the cells.  Dogs would die.

About me saying pleasure, yesterday, it may cost me heavily.  I did not mean to point anyone out.  I just wanted to offer my feelings on the matter.  We need to top thinking certain words illude such horrid meanings.

I did find out things that were being done by other/s freely, like I don't matter completely even to myself.

Nite Soon

The Daily Battles

Every day is a battle..

..Not for you.

Losing Focus in School

No parent has a right to make their kid feel so uncomfortable thinking they will feel that way anyway that their concentration in school drops, ability to memorize and learn.  No matter what they did.  They blame the parents.

Word Fantasy

Does it bother you that I used the word pleasure?  You seem to want to strip me of it.

Racial Sinning

You know, I never grew up with racism.  People think it is the cause of my own sin.

I'm wrong

You all take such pleasure in saying I'm wrong.  Like oh I'm bad.  WHY?

I do not matter anymore.

I got the message from someone supposedly replacing "all I was" that I just don't matter, my life will never matter anymore.

A Miserable Life

I found out the dirty little secret.  Is it indeed my dad who made my life miserable?  I could not concentrate in school.  Is that why people are scared to be good to me?

IMDb - The Soapbox

Problems - Analyzing Sensible Snap Reactions

Sometimes, I don't mean what I think exactly. Everyone is making a living watching my reaction and wishing bad things on me, possibly.. Is it okay if I say that now? I post about things like this. I mean, I may be mistaken, but I'm probably not. How will things turn out okay in such a way as this?

Some things just come out, and I don't mean them. I don't really feel I'm in the moment. So, I don't know why what I mean doesn't bowl over right. I don't like being put in critical instances with people like my dad and mom who know me enough to not care. I'm not saying I can't do it. It's just not the thing to do. 

"A Quicker Fixer Up-er"

I notice you only manage to dwell on things that involve me and only say it's wrong so you seem better and don't really care about how anyone would manage to concentrate and fix something like that, whatever it may be to you.

Does that..

Does that come with a creed?

Cuza Race

Why should I listen to anyone tell me what I say doesn't matter cuza my race?

What a Big One

Think of you all impatient monsters and machines who won't let younger people experience a nice life all because of how much older you are.

And race.. why tell me I am this I am that I think what I don't think I should think something else?  Shouldn't you be nice and help people achieve their dreams?

Problem

Someone has undue pleasure against me if little things cost me big ones.

No Problemo..

I do not have the problem.  You all just don't wanna be my friend.

To Whom I Speak

to those who approve of these problems!

Watcha Doing?

Do you even know what you are doing?  No one is perfect.  It is uncivilized to listen to what other people say someone said.  It was rather oncoming.  I was being pushed around.  I still am.  I feel I am being planted back in with just my parents.

I feel as though I am being taunted for fun, like I'm bad cuza Dad.

Turning on Me

The lot of you have turned on me for no reason.  I better go find me someone to talk to.  My therapist seems disgusted in me, like someone is telling her to do that.  I guess she is trying to help, tho.

Hm, I don't remember exactly the reason that coupled with why I posted this.

So, why are you all pushing me with weird thoughts and then spending the rest of a long time wondering about it?

Dr. Phil

I agree heavily with the mom and dad, the mom saying why would we be on the sho' if you wanna stay together?  She just wants help and to get that guy to stop it.  We erased the idea that it's the parents that are causing the problem.  I think he won't change and they need a divorce.  We just can't solve some things.

Dad

He keeps changing who he is.  Sometimes he's just the devil in my life.  Others, he's just a guy tryin' to make it.  Why does everyone hate me?

Dysfunctionality

Why are people so onto what I do when I don't know the made up rules and when I'm put on the spot but manage to change my demeanor, anyway, somehow?

My dad is ruining my life.  No one can ask him what to do to me..!