I have it up, so my mom can hear. "La Valse" by Ravel, who did Bolero.
Friday, March 22, 2013
New Kids on the Block
Why did you tell us kids growing up not to do what we want to do? Older kids are reluctant to give in to the norm. Funny how they think that only we are abnormal. I know I didn't do anything bad, but I mean it may be something to think about.
Ate
I had these mushy, like cheesy greens, these Asian spicy green beans, some hard green leaves, a chicken breast. 3D * * *
See if ya can top that! [|;D
My voice used to be high and childlike. Now, it's lower than low. See if you can top that Ginny, cuz if you're not then you're not.
Turn Me Off
Why do people like Ginny, Tim Burton, and Johnny Depp turn me off and then tell me they are interested in making me feel good? What about all the problems? Like, oh, I don't wanna talk to you, your room isn't clean.
Finished!. 30'
My room is cleaned but not neat nor sanitary, yet. Not sure how I will polish it. }:D So, yea, I put my bags by the door, so I have to like walk around them. I have bags in the corner and might get a smaller table. I can walk to the bathroom, though. So, that's why. It looks like later I need to make it look nice but don't think I'm gonna paint it. It is the garage, after all. My brother even redid his flooring, when we moved here, and it does look nice, you know?? I mean, did you do yours??? :| I just heard a worthless, nigger car roar past, what a coincidence. WTF is this? There are some things to tend to, want a bigger bookshelf and don't like putting it together. I dunno, though, you know?? Maybe have 2 so they're sturdy?? Also, fo some reason, I have boxes of bathroom stuff and shoe boxes of cards, programs, cards, envelopes, tickets, even receipts, and maybe some more stuff, and that's all really. I have a sofa, you know drawers, a shelf set up for outfits at the foot of my bed, a huge table, a shelf with a TV and scanner. I feel rather cozy, have some extra note cards, though. I have some extra bags and for some reason my old laptop.. Bathroom soon.. xp
Facebook Post
Why aren't you my friend, now? Why don't you talk to me? You talked to that other girl.
How It's Goin'
My mom came back and is walking Rocky, the Golden.
So, I cleaned up so much, just clearing the flo'. I will clean the rest sometime, but it's not terribly bad. I mean, I have like candy canes and stuff piled up. Also, I may need a shelf and eventually homework desk..
So, I cleaned up so much, just clearing the flo'. I will clean the rest sometime, but it's not terribly bad. I mean, I have like candy canes and stuff piled up. Also, I may need a shelf and eventually homework desk..
Facebook Conversation
So, the 1st 2 girls are 1-2 years older, and the last 1 is a year younger, from Mandeville, west of Slidell, where I lived.
Haha, Gnarls Barkley is on, from Atlanta, or whatsisname.
Haha, Gnarls Barkley is on, from Atlanta, or whatsisname.
Only seeing Courtney Cole would make me consider running to Boston tomorrow night even though I have to be there next weekend too.
- Kirstin Laire Martinez likes this.
- Kirstin Laire Martinez noooo. i mean thats totally awesome that she sold out but not awesome that you cant see her.
How's It's Goin'
Embassy Waltz on, dog trotting
Cleaned some stuff, did some laundry
Ah! How'm I gonna do this! ,D;
Cleaned some stuff, did some laundry
Ah! How'm I gonna do this! ,D;
So, here's the plan.
I want to take a walk for fun but have to clean my room + finish the laundry, put away the photo boxes.
Facebook Post
Only seeing Courtney Cole would make me consider running to Boston tomorrow night even though I have to be there next weekend too.
- Kirstin Laire Martinez likes this.
- Kirstin Laire Martinez noooo. i mean thats totally awesome that she sold out but not awesome that you cant see her.
- Christina Barrett Hey, guess what, I supposedly can't return to school until someone tells me okay and didn't give me a meeting time again. So, I became upset and contacted and informed them I would sue and tell on them. I called my teacher, who was out-of-town, but I told her again not to return the message. The teacher isn't a performer and can't make up her mind, but I have my own real problem. I just don't know what she expects from a person. She's a bit out there. I contacted all the kids in the class who let me, and not much back.
Glad to see ya'll kept in touch and got back. It's hard for me to get noticed.
I'm from Florida.
You keep thinking I was from Pennsylvania, but I've also lived in the New Orleans area a long time. I know you say things without detail and are gonna like cat at me. The problem with Louisiana was that it wasn't modern, but it wasn't like sorta deep-seated in old-fashioned things. :|
The West
To me, Slidell was the West. It seemed like the most substantial place on earth, save maybe Pakistan? No, Orlando may not be as hot, but NE FL is hotter than New Orleans. Yes, it's like there's no land here, no fog, no density. I don't know how far you can kick a ball, but I know in some way you'd wanna get outta he'"a." Maybe, we can't afford air conditioning. That's my thought. Also, New Orleans is a major city, so you'd have to go like to Ohio or the West or Las Vegas or even like Miami|Fort Lauderdale and like visit Key West. It's funny Ginny wants to plow through the shit, like some place in the Midwest that isn't major, the way her dad is from Pittsburgh and she's from Santa Clara, right by San Fransisco.. My family went to NY, and I ran into girls from NE|NJ and pretty much turned myself over to them. People from NYC like Anne Hathaway think it's about being basic, NYC, Pennsylvania, how gay! No, it was all about New England, not even New York. I just forgot to tell you that doesn't exist, it's just Boston and next to Pennsylvania is NJ.
Just the Right Climate
My theory is that people from cold places aren't very European but that Italy isn't the answer. I don't know about rocky, Southern Germany, but Switzerland is nice. Where else? Dunno. It seems cold by Russia. So, New Orleans is a good climate, Mexico is too hot. I forgot to tell you how hot it is. I dunno, I mean Georgia gets pretty cold, and Alabama probably gets both cold and hot. LV sounds good. }:] Talk about "the pool," like in Texas or Florida, thinking more about Florida being homey, for some reason.
Hey, guess what I found out?
Supposedly, people from Pennsylvania are different and not being white is what makes a Caucasian cool.
A Strange Visit
When someone is nice to me, even though my dad did something, my dad looks at you in a funny way.
Wot 2 Do
I have laundry and want to clean my room more. My dad comes home tomorrow, my mom home later tonight. I just had 2 Pizza Pockets, want 2 more, wish I had sushi, though, my dad made a quick trip sometimes skips over stuff like that, like my healthy cracker bread. Also.. cooking asparagus's on water. 3I
Where I'm From
So, I looked at Ellen DeGeneres's trip photos. I wonder if her show starts on Monday or if it started this week, again. Anyway, I would just say I was from Florida I guess and that maybe it's not as reverent as New Orleans and its borderline cities. The other problem is I don't know if they have any sorta Southern country areas. You know, it is the opposite. All I can say to that is yes I moved there and right away I picked up on it. I met people from the city and went there myself for about 2 years and pretty much have soaked in the culture, would just like to go back maybe do something if there's anything to do. It's not too small because you 1st have to get NYC out of the news. My next stop is LV. I'm from NO. I forgot, I'm from FL and moved to NO. I was a teenager in NO, my entire teenage life. Also, I wasn't a late bloomer, I was an early bloomer. I'm guessing that other people have relatives from other places. I guess I got out with adults, so I mean I learned @ the culture like a 2nd nature, but it's not quite as dizzying as northern Florida.
Problem
I just got the message Tim Burton had to tear up a boy I know from England, like wire him up cause he's a nigger. I know you just wanna say that word. I mean, what? Why do you care? Don't you have anything to talk about? It was probably just an accident.
Another Problem
So, I posted a picture, and I got the idea that Ellen DeGeneres wouldn't like it and would think she's better just because she's older, though, and that it's cool to be fat. So, I looked at it, and because of the N word thing I got quite a negative response, quite disgusting, and for no reason, whatsoever. I believe in me in the past. 8| I guess that's the test. If she thinks that's not so, she can't go.
Now, I'm Utterly Mad!
I am not supposed to return to Ginny's classes, supposedly yet, was not rescheduled an appointment.
I realized Ginny and other attractive people make up excuses about me because I'm not all Caucasian. They aren't accepting new kids since Tim Burton.
I realized Ginny and other attractive people make up excuses about me because I'm not all Caucasian. They aren't accepting new kids since Tim Burton.
Missed the Bus
I was supposed to reserve a ride home tomorrow. I'm tired, but maybe next weekend. My mom didn't encourage me. I didn't realize it was so late. I'm so tired from all the carbs. xp I ha - I may have schizophrenia.
How I Feel
I'm tired. I mean, I don't feel like walking. I could do some floor workouts, but I'm looking for something to do before I clean my room.
Problem
I got a message about my race that I was not really all white. It says French and Dutch. What is wrong with the Spanish? I mean, there is something wrong with someone of each race. That's not technically my race, but maybe you've seen my other blogs. I just didn't know what to say otherwise, my ideal race? Maybe, I should start a new blog? This one's doing good, just don't like the picture.>
What should I do?
I kinda don't feel like going to the mall nor to the movies, but I would see Oz, the Great and Powerful. My mom is gonna come get me. I'd have to take the bus, but I'm really, really tired. I have theater homework, I know Acting 1, just a Midterm journal however and supposedly redoing something I don't know about, also to memorize a rhyme for Tuesday for Voice for the Actor. However, Ginny might tell me to leave. I told the counselor I was going. I'm withdrawing from Weight Training, sometime, and I'm telling someone to take the hold off my record because I know it could happen. I bet Ginny knew this, and I bet she didn't decide herself.
Bratty Children
What do you think of mature adults with unattractive children, like the old paintings and photos? Why do they all seem that way?
Issue
So, you think I came as a shitty brunette, some fantasy for nigger parents to get it over with, a sacrificial lamb?
Watcha think
of like Ginny m********** thinking of how cool her kids will be if they were born when she was 40?
How I'm Doing
My face feels so infested from skipping a shower 2 days in a row. I have 2 huge pimples on my nose. I wanted to use a pore strip, dreamed I did. I just washed my face, put moisturizer on it, pimple cream, and chapstick. So, I'm eating. I had 2 Hot Pockets, no sushi, and am making I think Angel Hair paasts
Dream
My favorite part was when I was dancing, just realized now I looked a bit like Ginny and how I looked when I was in her class, like I was in the mysterious Winter Park or Alatmonte Springs, like I was involved in something on TV, like "The Ellen DeGeneres Show," in a dark, secluded place with 2 rooms and a mirror. I had my bangs, my face kinda rounded, like I was a ghost, someone's mother, visiting from the grave. Like, the sides of my face were tucked in in a triangular shape outlining a dying heart. My bangs made me look a certain way, like my eyes were pursed or something. I was doing ballet moves, like a real ballerina, like dipping and sorta turning, and it was just a big deal, did it for maybe 15 seconds. There was this sorta milky, thin strain of background music playing, simple music, and I was singing in a low, dipping voice, "My .. heart .. wants to .. Beat .. " What happened before was I easily conjured up a tall thin girl wtih dark hair, milky arms, and Ginny was dancing with her, holding her from the back, in the other room. I seemed like Audrey Hepburn, an old ballerina from Florida who had dreams. I seemed just to be a moving thing with no voice. Previously back in my dreams, I thought I was gonna sign up to do gymnastics on a team every day for 2-3 hours. So, next, after awhile, I became small with just like black netting for clothes, like a leotard, you know like the idea of an animated bat ghost. I was waltzing around like a Disney Haunted Mansion with Ginny and it was like she was carrying me, I was short, like maybe around her shoulders or a little more, and I just imagined this person like shoving me around, carrying me through.. and then I guess the dream stopped and I was sad.
Things that happened otherwise, my mom went to supposedly this dirty place like a mental hospital and said hi to a lady with light brown hair and bangs pursed we passed up twice with 2 little dark, Chinese girls and some others, like maybe a man around 35-40, eating at a table with cushioned chares facing one another, benches. So, I went in a bed, wanted food, and was thinking why don't I think about if in class Ginny picked me up as an example! =D Then, she appeared and was acting like sorta a tacky Spanish lady and was holding me awhile and we went through to the other scene. For awhile, she was walking with me as tall as her, feels more like Ellen DeGeneres. I also dreamed something and then that she was hurt and her heart became small like mine in her body, ready to be torn out. So, what was I gonna say? I forget! I might think of it, later. Oh yes, she hugged me, I thought for some reason I think of now her private being like an urchin or something. She was like swaying me in the dancing scene, like I was shorter and smaller than her. Ah, yes, and I compared myself to the lanky girl, and we found my chest and torso actually were milky and sucked in, like a button. I just figured I was shorter. I probably had an inverted diamond want in my look. So, when I imagined being hugged, I didn't feel much, and it was like I was skinny and a big shorter but an adult and she was like more strong and successful and was worried, but you know really she was not too small but seemed small with me.
It's hard to remember the rest, now. :|
So, as the dream went on, I have dreams of me locked in as a mover with music coming on that I supposedly was singing. It's like I was dead and raised from the grave. It was some sad thing that never could be, and in my doing the right thing was being picked at.>
Things that happened otherwise, my mom went to supposedly this dirty place like a mental hospital and said hi to a lady with light brown hair and bangs pursed we passed up twice with 2 little dark, Chinese girls and some others, like maybe a man around 35-40, eating at a table with cushioned chares facing one another, benches. So, I went in a bed, wanted food, and was thinking why don't I think about if in class Ginny picked me up as an example! =D Then, she appeared and was acting like sorta a tacky Spanish lady and was holding me awhile and we went through to the other scene. For awhile, she was walking with me as tall as her, feels more like Ellen DeGeneres. I also dreamed something and then that she was hurt and her heart became small like mine in her body, ready to be torn out. So, what was I gonna say? I forget! I might think of it, later. Oh yes, she hugged me, I thought for some reason I think of now her private being like an urchin or something. She was like swaying me in the dancing scene, like I was shorter and smaller than her. Ah, yes, and I compared myself to the lanky girl, and we found my chest and torso actually were milky and sucked in, like a button. I just figured I was shorter. I probably had an inverted diamond want in my look. So, when I imagined being hugged, I didn't feel much, and it was like I was skinny and a big shorter but an adult and she was like more strong and successful and was worried, but you know really she was not too small but seemed small with me.
It's hard to remember the rest, now. :|
So, as the dream went on, I have dreams of me locked in as a mover with music coming on that I supposedly was singing. It's like I was dead and raised from the grave. It was some sad thing that never could be, and in my doing the right thing was being picked at.>
Bed
Must lie down, hope I make it to the bathroom.. On my walk, well.. got tired and lay down, feel emtpy like a GUMMI GUMMI GUMMI GUMMI GUMMI BEAR. Please don't tell me, ooh, I've felt like a gummi bear, I just didn't feel like talking about it. Or maybe I don't have any problems and don't need to tell you.
Facebook Conversations
- Bailey Romano Oh, I enjoy it for the content too. I think it's a great modern portrayal of classic stories, but he is pretty too.
- Christina Barrett Too bad we don't know, like, maybe the girls with dark hair have dark hair because they're Italian or part something.
Problem
I sense a sequence of attacks hovering in the air by Ellen DeGeneres to my teacher Ginny, just because she's copying Tim Burton's p****. I mean, she is convinced I am a bad person, gives in to racism, pretty much stuck in a rut, I guess. Anyway, I'm mad at anyone like that. Everyone gets mad at me in some way, but the only person who seems human that I can think of who I know of who seems like a success story like in the arts like I've been told and felt in private is Renée Fleming. Why in private do I always feel Ellen DeGeneres bitching because she has a mother fucking TV show? She is flipping ideas of like if you think of 1 thing or any thing. She is negative. She promised to be good but is mean to me in private. I hear clicks and every time I load the page I think she said something. Can someone stop it? I already asked. When I see her on TV, I am convinced she does this. Please have her stop telling everyone to die because they didn't watch her show. She doesn't seem to know TV too well, herself.. so I won't believe it. I didn't appreciate being insulted for saying something @ Renée Fleming. What? It sounds too complicated, and you think it was used against her? No, it was just because I said it. She has a thing for me like Tim Burton. Tim Burton said I was perfect except not all white. It's because I am never mean. You all are like making me feel guilty for wanting to feel good and for my celestial accomplishments, in the classic arts and complex ways of feeling. You just tell me you're not interested because my mom is Chinese and my dad isn't.. Also, why do people in Louisiana act racist against people who think about being cool rather than racist and cool? Why are they like on top sometimes? You don't even know my race unless I tell you. You think you know in some way. Stop acting gay around me, I can be somebody and still be attractive. }:|
Got Back
So, I threw away all the garbage and recycled all my drink bottles - still have some caps. I have to like put away some things, more laundry. What else? Neaten up some things.. See if I can rearrange some things. This is really stupid. I'm taking more medicine, need to vaccuum.
So, I stopped. I saw something on the floor, small, oval-ish, reddish brown. I saw it crumble. I left the house, and my dad flipped me off in his tone but acted like he didn't and I kinda left in a mean way but not like loud. I just felt bad and it happened. I didn't say yes I want to talk to you. I was just mad knew that I wasn't safe.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)