Monday, August 15, 2016
Lies
People think I'm having a hissy fit about not wanting to interact and pay attention to younger people.
They think I don't need nor deserve attention from older adults.
They think I don't need nor deserve attention from older adults.
Facial Features
If you have more creases rather than smooth face just means you're a different kind of person or a drastically different age.
You can't play going back and forth saying, "Oh, no creases means not that you're young but that you're smart and don't need lines, except for everyone else it means a good thing."
You can't play going back and forth saying, "Oh, no creases means not that you're young but that you're smart and don't need lines, except for everyone else it means a good thing."
Cool Eye Color
In America, we tend to have lighter eyes, but really cool people in Europe all seem to have dark blue eyes.
Attacks and Rudeness
So, people look for those who did themselves the best and are out to get them thereon out.
People in Europe can be so rude listening to people like that and regurgitating it back to me in their own style.
People in Europe can be so rude listening to people like that and regurgitating it back to me in their own style.
Setting Me Apart in a Bad Way
People seem to know that there are possibly bad things about me more than others and discriminate against me from Europe like they like sloppy people tho.
Update
New Page - Problems
When I was 11, I was doing my homework when my dad came home, and it just came out maybe, "Oh, no," and he said nothing, when I was gonna say it was cuz after yet again doing my homework since I got home am not done and cannot have enough family time. I just wanted to joke around.
When I was 11, I was doing my homework when my dad came home, and it just came out maybe, "Oh, no," and he said nothing, when I was gonna say it was cuz after yet again doing my homework since I got home am not done and cannot have enough family time. I just wanted to joke around.
When Together, Not Even Simply Coexisting
If I feel cool about someone else, why can't I just exist too without being clawed it when there's something that could be going for me in the world?
I know someone thinks about me as a person that "there's nothing in it."
People who really are harsh on them are "cool" tho, with them.
I know someone thinks about me as a person that "there's nothing in it."
People who really are harsh on them are "cool" tho, with them.
The Coolest Saints
reference
There are possibly fallen angels who have half human half angel hybrids, something God did not want.
There are at least 2 female angels mentioned together in the Bible. However, angels may not have a gender.
Maybe, another gender of angel exists if the fallen angels reproduce.
Are they cherabim and seraphim? Their definitions are ambiguous, the 1st supposedly guarding Eden and the 2nd being of highest order.
(link)
There are possibly fallen angels who have half human half angel hybrids, something God did not want.
There are at least 2 female angels mentioned together in the Bible. However, angels may not have a gender.
Maybe, another gender of angel exists if the fallen angels reproduce.
Are they cherabim and seraphim? Their definitions are ambiguous, the 1st supposedly guarding Eden and the 2nd being of highest order.
(link)
Flubbing on the Spot
People today keep acting like I'm weak and think things that have big, bad purposes.
They're making it up on the spot, one after another.
Just watch TV.
They're making it up on the spot, one after another.
Just watch TV.
Older Teenagers
Did you know teenagers born around 1997 and 1998 believe people my age shouldn't be growing as the kids we were when they were born? Like, their childhood is lasting now almost 20 years.
They seem to think it is inappropriate for even babies today to look up to them as someone older.
They seem to think it is inappropriate for even babies today to look up to them as someone older.
Post - Eurasian Nation
link
It sounds like you did not have a straight answer for your daughter. I do not feel I have a straight answer for you. I think you can identify yourself as either white European Caucasian or Asian, and Asian can be white, tan, or yellow. You would not be called yellow, unless your skin really were yellow, which I've seen Asians with yellow. Tho, Europeans would see Asians as having more of a yellow tone than they do. I do not have many Asian traits for some reason, so people do not generally seem to wonder about my color in relation to how Asian I look.
It sounds like you did not have a straight answer for your daughter. I do not feel I have a straight answer for you. I think you can identify yourself as either white European Caucasian or Asian, and Asian can be white, tan, or yellow. You would not be called yellow, unless your skin really were yellow, which I've seen Asians with yellow. Tho, Europeans would see Asians as having more of a yellow tone than they do. I do not have many Asian traits for some reason, so people do not generally seem to wonder about my color in relation to how Asian I look.
He he he
My dad thinks since I'm being monitored he can tell me what to do via who's watching me.
Before, they said he didn't or couldn't do that.
Before, they said he didn't or couldn't do that.
Problem With My Hair
I used to dye my hair a lot in a short period of time cuz my hair is so hard to dye and impatience.
It still prickles from it.
It seems a hair falls out every time I comb my fingers thru my hair.
I'm trying to grow it longer and grow out my bangs. Something's wrong with it.
It still prickles from it.
It seems a hair falls out every time I comb my fingers thru my hair.
I'm trying to grow it longer and grow out my bangs. Something's wrong with it.
Haphazardness
If I am being experimented on, why would I listen to anyone if I'm the one who's being followed for intelligence?
They are too sloppy with me or mean on purpose.
They are too sloppy with me or mean on purpose.
An *Alter Ego
No offense, don't take this post sarcastically!
---
I may have always been in trouble.
I'm in a program where I meet people I like online or other ways, while being monitored.
---
Supposedly, I am in trouble and someone else is meeting these people too.
I don't think it would be odd for me to be like everyone else and meet people on my own.
---
I am not upset at the person meeting people with me, just that it is found necessary by people I like to use the person against me.
That's not many people.
Yes, the person meeting people with me has been mean to me without being sorry. I feel they are supported to do this by people I like.
I don't care much about people I don't like.
---
People I like may find that I have negative beliefs, but that's not what this says, in American English at least.
Like I said at the beginning, in case you didn't realize: "No offense, don't take this post sarcastically!"
This post was carefully written not to say what you might still think I think that I don't.
---
*alter ego - 1. a person's secondary or alternative personality. 2. an intimate and trusted friend. (link)
---
I may have always been in trouble.
I'm in a program where I meet people I like online or other ways, while being monitored.
---
Supposedly, I am in trouble and someone else is meeting these people too.
I don't think it would be odd for me to be like everyone else and meet people on my own.
---
I am not upset at the person meeting people with me, just that it is found necessary by people I like to use the person against me.
That's not many people.
Yes, the person meeting people with me has been mean to me without being sorry. I feel they are supported to do this by people I like.
I don't care much about people I don't like.
---
People I like may find that I have negative beliefs, but that's not what this says, in American English at least.
Like I said at the beginning, in case you didn't realize: "No offense, don't take this post sarcastically!"
This post was carefully written not to say what you might still think I think that I don't.
---
*alter ego - 1. a person's secondary or alternative personality. 2. an intimate and trusted friend. (link)
Playing in the Orchestra
I wish I made up my mind sooner.
I should have listened to being recruited to something fun like band and played the oboe.
I just started individual violin lessons after a group class in college 11 years ago. I am serious about it. I'm gonna be in an orchestra in a couple weeks.
I'll probably keep playing in college and am interested in pursuing a doctorate in violin.
I should have listened to being recruited to something fun like band and played the oboe.
I just started individual violin lessons after a group class in college 11 years ago. I am serious about it. I'm gonna be in an orchestra in a couple weeks.
I'll probably keep playing in college and am interested in pursuing a doctorate in violin.
Stereotypes
Now, that I have a high school diploma, I'm not learning so much about History but Music History and Theory. It's a different game.
Since school is starting..
..and yes, I plan to go back to a community college next semester.
Homework. I think teachers should never give busywork, like learning thru taking notes.
They could hand out the outline and a copy of the lecture.
Forget the textbook. This isn't Mother Goose.
Homework. I think teachers should never give busywork, like learning thru taking notes.
They could hand out the outline and a copy of the lecture.
Forget the textbook. This isn't Mother Goose.
Old People
They are siding with the bad young people.
In the end, I never talk to anyone I want. I do talk to people I don't want to talk to so much.
These people may not be my strongest desire to talk to, but still I would in my way.
Old people are offended if you feel hurt by bad young people. They just wanna be cool.
In the end, I never talk to anyone I want. I do talk to people I don't want to talk to so much.
These people may not be my strongest desire to talk to, but still I would in my way.
Old people are offended if you feel hurt by bad young people. They just wanna be cool.
The Coolest Saints
reference
There are possibly fallen angels who have half human half angel hybrids, something God did not want.
There are at least 2 female angels mentioned together in the Bible. However, angels may not have a gender.
Maybe, another gender of angel exists if the fallen angels reproduce.
Are they cherabim and seraphim? Their definitions are ambiguous, the 1st supposedly guarding Eden and the 2nd being of highest order.
(link)
There are possibly fallen angels who have half human half angel hybrids, something God did not want.
There are at least 2 female angels mentioned together in the Bible. However, angels may not have a gender.
Maybe, another gender of angel exists if the fallen angels reproduce.
Are they cherabim and seraphim? Their definitions are ambiguous, the 1st supposedly guarding Eden and the 2nd being of highest order.
(link)
Sick of It
People are going around picking on me for my flaws. They think I believe in things I don't. It's hard to explain.
For example, I see Asians, Latinos, blacks, Middle Easterners, and white Americans totally give for white Europeans.
For example, I see Asians, Latinos, blacks, Middle Easterners, and white Americans totally give for white Europeans.
The Reason
They just answered. They said they didn't really do it. They suggest that I did, but I didn't do what they're talking about.
Living in the Moment
I noticed some people acting like different ethnicities. There are both positive and negative motives/repercussions.
The negative part is the part I unraveled, at least in some way.
I noticed they were doing it to make a statement but in a certain way don't really care.
They deny I care, but I didn't use it as an excuse to not do the right thing in some part of things.
The negative part is the part I unraveled, at least in some way.
I noticed they were doing it to make a statement but in a certain way don't really care.
They deny I care, but I didn't use it as an excuse to not do the right thing in some part of things.
Sunday, August 14, 2016
Did you see the trailer for "Mother's Day?"
I actually like Julia Roberts, but they dyed her hair red to look like Bella Thorne. I like what Ellen DeGeneres stands for, but she is making me like Jennifer Aniston, instead. That's insulting to Jennifer Aniston.
(link)
(link)
Ballet
My mom wants me to take ballet. It has beginning/intermediate twice a week for adults. There's an advanced level, too, but I'm taking beginning/intermediate.
Here's what the kids do:
Here's what the kids do:
How I Feel
Some people may be withdrawn or ^preoccupied^ and even mentally ^disturbed^ and ^need help^.
I feel "emotionally ^challenged^."
(link)
I feel "emotionally ^challenged^."
(link)
Prejudice of a Certain Stereotype
If you are prejudiced towards males who are dark with dark hair and dark eyes with a gruff look, then you are missing something and that is shallow-minded to believe cool people are all one way, like Hitler, long, thin, blonde, smooth, but ditzy. You can be whoever you want eventually, but you are wrong to musjudge people and be rude "to their face."
(link)
(link)
"Solo" Musicians Gather to Flock Together
I am watching TV, and they were showing the blue whale, the largest known animal in the world.
I noticed the background music sounded like high-pitched choral singing with an orchestral group in the background.
I wish I could just participate in something like that and have already long quit the piano and organ.
If I knew a bit earlier even that I could rent instruments, I would have been learning the oboe. I am doing violin, now.
You know, they really have a comfortable life, in a way. They play instruments that play one line. They start in grade school and perform every semester. They can join a group rather than becoming like the phantom of the opera in their basement playing and singing along but almost always alone.
Actually, I've been in church/school choir mostly age 8-18. It was actually one of the biggest things of my life.
(link)
I noticed the background music sounded like high-pitched choral singing with an orchestral group in the background.
I wish I could just participate in something like that and have already long quit the piano and organ.
If I knew a bit earlier even that I could rent instruments, I would have been learning the oboe. I am doing violin, now.
You know, they really have a comfortable life, in a way. They play instruments that play one line. They start in grade school and perform every semester. They can join a group rather than becoming like the phantom of the opera in their basement playing and singing along but almost always alone.
Actually, I've been in church/school choir mostly age 8-18. It was actually one of the biggest things of my life.
(link)
Prestigious Colored African People
There are 2 kinds of colored African people, dark and light.
I notice there are some healthier looking people of African American heritage and very few of them seem fair tho some do.
For example, on The Ellen DeGeneres Show, there was a mom and daughter dancers, and the mom, who was African American, seemed fair and very smart and to act good according to standards of Europeans/White Americans.
Leontyne Price (opera singer from Mississippi in the New Orleans area)
(link)
I notice there are some healthier looking people of African American heritage and very few of them seem fair tho some do.
For example, on The Ellen DeGeneres Show, there was a mom and daughter dancers, and the mom, who was African American, seemed fair and very smart and to act good according to standards of Europeans/White Americans.
Leontyne Price (opera singer from Mississippi in the New Orleans area)
(link)
Brandenburg Concerto 3-1 - by Bach
They are from Las Vegas. The Carolinas and Las Vegas remind me of my home in the New Orleans, Louisiana area.
Friday, August 12, 2016
Monday, July 11, 2016
My Dad
I think some people I really like did something cuza my dad, committed their bodies to 1 soul and make it so I can't feel worthwhile among them.
Manners?
Do you know of someone getting mad at you for thinking highly of them and then blaming you for not being good enough for themselves in their opinion?
Praytell
What did other people do to deserve to get my relationships and keep me from having them, like oh maybe they met them or something..
Redundancy
So, they're coming in my home telling me an insult and then another to top it off, like I can't cope.
Can't Really Get Out of This
If I'm smarter cuz I'm not born around 1997 and 1998, why not listen to me?
Monday, June 13, 2016
Music
My violin sub seemed to think I needed even more practice to do anything, at all.
Singing seems more worth it for me now Maybe.
Problem
They are acting like they are all that and that person has been onto me for this, like some big secret.
Problem
I was looking around the room, and they were acting like someone I like would be mean and do away with me.
Problem
They said it was okay for people who are nice I like a lot to be mean to me. One bad thought hits my mind, tho, and it's over.
Problem
I accidentally simply had the word come to my mind and say it in my mind, "Kill her," about someone. I don't really care to mean it. I've lost a relationship that has been a part of my life more than I wanted in some ways but not in others, and now they are teasing me with it saying I can't have another relationship I had from before because of it.
Problem
They are acting like something big just happened. I don't even know what it was. I just know I was attacked by my parents socially, secretly.
Attacked by Ellen DeGeneres
Ellen DeGeneres won't stop putting Bella Thorne in my life ruining it cuz I cursed about the illegal, hurtful noises she had put in my room. Nothing seems to really be about me. My dad seems to be the problem, causing this. I want to not feel molested by my parents.
Monday, June 6, 2016
Nice People
It's nice to see nice people are afraid to be mean about me and cut off the conversation with others.
Fighting Their Way - But Against Me
It's funny to see people, esp. other minorities, climb their way to the top by saying I'm an outcast and odd.
Classical Establishments
People say liking church music, Renaissance, church, etc., are "just having sex" like an insult. What next?
I'm not stupid.
I can tell people who are not all white suffer undo hate and stress and look worse, when it's oh-so-important for all whites to feel good.
Careers
Can you be trusted if you don't have a career? This is an old one. You need a career to keep yourself improving? Well, I know how you have to sacrifice other careers for it.
Alike
They say I am like my parents but would be willing to do me in and then changing to be more ideal.
Wednesday, June 1, 2016
Okay, enough is enough!
Regardless of the age difference between our parents, I wished the best to you and if you deny it then *desist to bother me.
*desist - cease; abstain (link)
*desist - cease; abstain (link)
I'm right.
Just because my thoughts come to me viciously still sometimes now, does not make me wrong! You'll lose!
No Remedy
You say I have these promises, but then you keep threatening it like I'm a slob in life. I have a hard time on medicine, and you'd suppose everyone'd know by now that medicine makes you fat in the end.
"Other" Relationships
It looks like you're seeking just to destroy my most special, earned and in some form generally needed types of relationships and give them all to other people who aren't a big part of my life but some of whom could have been. They are people like Bella Thorne, my younger girl cousin who is the daughter of my dad's youngest sibling and sister, who I hardly see and who doesn't talk to me much, and old best friends who made me look like I was the bad guy unsuccessfully.
Then, why..
..do I feel Bella Thorne is getting things she didn't earn and sending a message to me that I don't deserve what I earned socially? I don't care if everyone else does it. She shouldn't have crossed paths with me like this. I don't even follow her anymore cuz she was Ellen's idea to follow like a queen or princess and I don't watch Ellen now.
Well
They were always atrocious to work with. Why ask them for anything? Supposedly, some people are detaching themselves from the experiment/'s problems.
Like, I'd wonder why am I in trouble when it's their fault experimenting on me in an un-ideal way, without understanding.
I enjoyed some of life during this very much but mostly not. Primarily before I was in trouble. I don't think this was allowed to happen. I think my dad went out of control.
I had already given them a warm invitation to leave, but now I've met people. That just puts another issue into perspective. I think it's fun when I'm not in trouble, but they think they can just go insane, or my dad, and curse my present life. They have so many weird problems. They never were "above" me.
I found my career path was a big problem, cuz I lost it. Now, I have found an improvement of one. I have one thing to deal with, and that is that I got to take violin kinda by accident in my past and now I feel something of a virtuoso in 3 keys considering I'm not advanced.
Like, I'd wonder why am I in trouble when it's their fault experimenting on me in an un-ideal way, without understanding.
I enjoyed some of life during this very much but mostly not. Primarily before I was in trouble. I don't think this was allowed to happen. I think my dad went out of control.
I had already given them a warm invitation to leave, but now I've met people. That just puts another issue into perspective. I think it's fun when I'm not in trouble, but they think they can just go insane, or my dad, and curse my present life. They have so many weird problems. They never were "above" me.
I found my career path was a big problem, cuz I lost it. Now, I have found an improvement of one. I have one thing to deal with, and that is that I got to take violin kinda by accident in my past and now I feel something of a virtuoso in 3 keys considering I'm not advanced.
"Just say it," "right now."
They are taking away my rights to talking to others, but they don't seem to always realize that other people are getting to talk supposedly or someday they say sometimes and not suffer what I do.
Listening
I am listening for the truth so I can filter it out when I lose my anger trigger I had since starting to watch The Ellen DeGeneres Show.
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