If I do it, I want:
• active duty
• combat
• army
$60,000-$120,000 college for 4+ years
I'm thinking I'll be in school anyway for a doctorate. I don't really wanna give that up. I felt I've been told in music it's about private lessons and not college, but I was told to go to college if I wanna sing again.
Wednesday, August 31, 2016
I think I know why people go active duty or reserves.
It's fun. You also are in good shape and are astute. It pays well and for college, too.
It was interesting today reflecting on attending the part time job event. I think a guy who must have been Middle Eastern, did say where he was from, was interested, a more obese short one, which I'm cool with. I felt the recruiters, at least some white, didn't file me up as a nonwhite just because he was there and knowing what I seem like I like and chose to do. I would love to be a comrade of other races, too, tho!
It was interesting today reflecting on attending the part time job event. I think a guy who must have been Middle Eastern, did say where he was from, was interested, a more obese short one, which I'm cool with. I felt the recruiters, at least some white, didn't file me up as a nonwhite just because he was there and knowing what I seem like I like and chose to do. I would love to be a comrade of other races, too, tho!
Something for Everyone: There's gotta be a light at the end of the tunnel.
I was thinking about how famous Bella Thorne is, tho it is sorta a secret fame of someone really famous! You know, girls, guys, if you wanna be like that you gotta get into the business of modeling and things or we all have the right to settle for what it's worth those with fame.
I had a hard time. I actually said I wanted to sing and play flute/violin at age 5 and 6. My parents didn't do it, and I don't know why. They said I was pretty well-behaved for a 5-year-old. They did provoke me to write a hate note. I had other problems at 3 and 4 like picking my nose and pooing in my pants!
There's more. I tried learning a song on piano with my dad and I was put in piano lessons at age 9. I resented people telling me I'd be a pianist. 20 years later, I know it's because it's lonely, more more lonely than people in band and orchestra! even singing!
I've been singing again after a 2 year break in using my voice much at all since 2010. It has really helped my musicality to feel myself pushed to achieve.
I had a hard time. I actually said I wanted to sing and play flute/violin at age 5 and 6. My parents didn't do it, and I don't know why. They said I was pretty well-behaved for a 5-year-old. They did provoke me to write a hate note. I had other problems at 3 and 4 like picking my nose and pooing in my pants!
There's more. I tried learning a song on piano with my dad and I was put in piano lessons at age 9. I resented people telling me I'd be a pianist. 20 years later, I know it's because it's lonely, more more lonely than people in band and orchestra! even singing!
I've been singing again after a 2 year break in using my voice much at all since 2010. It has really helped my musicality to feel myself pushed to achieve.
No Promise
Bella Thorne supposedly means well, but she kept flipping back and forth. She's hypnotically demanding people I have a relationship with to tease me in how they treat her, like she's listening to Ellen DeGeneres.
Can't Give In
I'm not falling and giving in like it's all over.
I know school no longer exists for me, not the high school scene, at least.
I just feel with the people experimenting on me, giving me such odd rules, that life is only deteriorating now anyway, ruining the peace of things that are important to me.
Problem
They keep rubbing in that when I was hitting/with my little punching bag that because I thought they said something at some time and I hit it again that I can't have it.
It's because my dad's oldest younger sister thinks if that happens I can't have it.
It is a punching bag, but they didn't like it when I squirmed around on and hit my sofa.
I disagree. People speak of letting out anger in that way, like with a pillow.
So what?
It's because my dad's oldest younger sister thinks if that happens I can't have it.
It is a punching bag, but they didn't like it when I squirmed around on and hit my sofa.
I disagree. People speak of letting out anger in that way, like with a pillow.
So what?
Tuesday, August 30, 2016
Going to Bed?
I'm apprehensive about waiting to see the outcome from others of me being pressed full to the brim in frustration in private. It was like life going on and off in me, what little there may be left. I mean come on, it is a punching bag. Sure I felt bad with other parts of my body some.
They are making threats about my relationships again and may not cap it off.
I'm most frustrated they continue to abuse me more if I post problems. I just felt so made fun of.
I got my Dammit Doll out, too, with instructions to slam it and as the stuffing falls yell "dammit dammit dammit!"
They are making threats about my relationships again and may not cap it off.
I'm most frustrated they continue to abuse me more if I post problems. I just felt so made fun of.
I got my Dammit Doll out, too, with instructions to slam it and as the stuffing falls yell "dammit dammit dammit!"
Silly Rules
The people experimenting on me and spying on me in private are acting ridiculous to me. They are set that if I get physically upset that my present relationship is detracted from. I'm not the one with the problem!
They said someone I look up to was living in the moment against me. I can sense more like this up their bag of tricks, meddling with my private life.
They said someone I look up to was living in the moment against me. I can sense more like this up their bag of tricks, meddling with my private life.
Pried Into
Ellen DeGeneres set for Bella Thorne to get involved in my most interpersonal relationships, like the world opening me up like they can do whatever they want.
I feel Bella Thorne is participating but doesn't get treated like she's in trouble as much as me, like I should be.
What is she doing? She is getting into it for Ellen DeGeneres? Is it some decision she made? Why would it happen to involve me? She isn't really that close to those people in a normal way.
I feel Bella Thorne is participating but doesn't get treated like she's in trouble as much as me, like I should be.
What is she doing? She is getting into it for Ellen DeGeneres? Is it some decision she made? Why would it happen to involve me? She isn't really that close to those people in a normal way.
Feeling a Little Depressed
I used my little punching bag. I don't know how I would wind up to that level of behavior.
Change of Plan
I spiraled out of an old plan. I know for now I will take violin lessons. The college I want to go to if I move away requires a secondary instrument for 1 credit hour I think, which I would have as piano and instead of class piano.
Italian Beauties
(links: 1 2)


at least part German-American
(link)

English girl
(link)

Tis, tis, how teenagers and young adults turn out in white Caucasian people. Like Latinos looking older as toddlers or young children, so did I look mature. I wasn't lacking, so much, maybe an audience.
You know, my dad seems to have it out for me thinking my posting style is actually an offense and thinks it's shit that my bad side comes from him. No, if he was that crass, he would need to shape up himself. My beliefs are obviously right. I guess I'm not a little twin of my parents. My dad keeps revealing in how he acts around me all of a sudden that he thinks I think pervertedly of my peers. I don't do bad things, but I read into them, things other people and their parents do in relation to one another. It can be chosen as a sensitive thing for others, but apparently it's not.
So, too bad for those snotty white Caucasian teenagers who keep the world from living, having fun, and feeling in touch with their inner child.


at least part German-American
(link)

English girl
(link)

Tis, tis, how teenagers and young adults turn out in white Caucasian people. Like Latinos looking older as toddlers or young children, so did I look mature. I wasn't lacking, so much, maybe an audience.
You know, my dad seems to have it out for me thinking my posting style is actually an offense and thinks it's shit that my bad side comes from him. No, if he was that crass, he would need to shape up himself. My beliefs are obviously right. I guess I'm not a little twin of my parents. My dad keeps revealing in how he acts around me all of a sudden that he thinks I think pervertedly of my peers. I don't do bad things, but I read into them, things other people and their parents do in relation to one another. It can be chosen as a sensitive thing for others, but apparently it's not.
So, too bad for those snotty white Caucasian teenagers who keep the world from living, having fun, and feeling in touch with their inner child.
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