TV

I liked Jennifer Anniston on Ellen.  She is very sweet.

Garth Brooks was also very nice.

There aren't many clips online and my computer was slow .. and the show was interrupted and I ended up turning it off.  Whoops, it may have come back on.

Health

I had an apple today.  It seems I'm getting healthier.  Too bad about the diabetes.  He thought I should get an early start and get shots, but I said no.  Instead, I am gonna get of my psych meds.  I just have to switch psychiatrists.  I could die, lose eyesight.. I can't even get an early appointment.  Should I wean myself?

TV

about to watch Ellen

I guess..

..I got away with myself.  Sorry.  I figured I should not try to be mad cuz it made me more mad, too.

Exercise

Abs - 10 Minutes

Wonder if it tempered me.

Where I'm At..

Laundry

I cleaned and vacuumed my room.

I just need a shelf for my books, might stack em up here.

Looking forward to Ellen @ 3.

Edit

I set my YouTube videos to private.  I'll add more public ones.  I wanted to take away the copyrighted ones.  I do want to be a singer.  The accompaniments didn't indicate neither if we could record over them and post them online.. so I won't.  I can see why.  :/

I don't see

why they point out me cursing or hitting things or screaming.  You just stay positive and say not to do it, not sit there and poke a bug with a stick.  It is worthless to be here.

What I Did

dishes, ate zucchini, washed laundry, ironed, dried laundry, vacuumed

 Now, I have to finish the laundry and wash whites and special things.

Problems

I got upset and squeamed and by accident hit the laundry machine once.  I stopped doing that more now.  I don't know who was on my mind, but it doesn't matter cuz I dunno I just feel out of place, a failure.  They continued to bug me more.  I guess I have to live with it, like Anne Frank.

The Day

I guess I will wash, iron, and clean up my room the best I can without getting a new shelf yet.

another nite another dream. . . .

nap time

Pretty Weird

Last night, I was bouncing in my chair in anger.  I'm still in anger.  I don't want to think about this person every time I post on my blog.

For some reason

when things get stuck in my blog, I think of what it was done to remind me of and it doesn't stop.  It's not that bad if I get mad because it's actually understandable.

Why

has it been so hard to focus here always?

Problems

I don't like the reminder with the +1 and I am not here to listen to whatever anyone says!  You did this illegally!  You could go to prison.  I thought of it again!

Problem

I don't know what to do about this.  I want to get away from these people.

Problem

When my blog loads, I think of a person because of the +1 sign they put when I was upset, kinda like on my old computer the scroll mark on the topic part going up after I got upset all 1 week after seeing someone I like.  Also, they started out saying birthday with this person.

I gotta go..

You shouldn't make me believe I did something bad.  You did.

Bye!

So, I hope everything is okay.  I am tired.  I hope I don't have to be punished, and I am 28 and I know they are doing it for no reason, even if nothing had happened.  What do you think about what they did?  I had nowhere to turn.  I should have thought thru.  I hit a road block.  I got worried.  I had eaten and was about to sleep, but my mom just came in to talk about tomorrow, like we were supposed to.  I don't really see it as losing a person each time something happens or if something physical does come up, again  I see it as a shadow hanging over me.  I wonder if I lost something for being frantic.  I think I already lost things, too, it seems now.  It felt better before.  My life is trapped and confined to certain things.