So, I woke up and my dad came down the hallway. People in the experiment told him when I was coming out.. I left the TV on, and I guess it made my walking really annoying. I came in the room and juggled the fact if I could stop walking like that I'd get in trouble anyway, which would be worse for some reason, for thinking of the terms "nigger" and "piece of shit" again. Also, I wasn't trying to walk that way, so I was just shocked by the whole thing and walking again into the presence of my dad. I was going for the kitchen, which is hearing of the living area they were in. I changed it to that I was upset at someone else. I didn't want to hurt anyone so didn't bother thinking about that cuz that's what I do.
Now, my dad did numerous some big symbols of like maybe he's carrying and caressing me between my legs. I don't even go out and let him touch me and don't like going out and hugging him. He won't stop it seems. He's vicious about "touching" me..
I cannot now seem to get rid of some feelings in a certain spot. I am appalled by my dad in many ways now and want to start making my way out of their life. Unfortunately, I may not get off the pills until I am alone..
I see no reason my dad thinks he can naturally abuse me mentally|***-related ways like this. He thinks that's his aim in life, though he is mean to me racially. It wasn't his 1st concern, though. He left life with nothing, and then this is what he thought he could do. This is what he thought was important, making my life hard socially, too, in the house.
Don't be too hard on the man, but it is hurtful.