Christina Barrett
2013-01-15
Acting I – Journal – Valencia
2013-01-15
Acting I – Journal – Valencia
I am taking the class because I like the instructor and like Acting class. My expectations are to have established a good base for something in this world in the arts of performance.
I want to grow in areas of – well, I was getting into singing and was happy this teacher was also into singing, well a world known vocalist in general… I also did all the arts. Mostly, I was interested in my singing voice. I noticed that it didn’t have an aura. It still was a nice sorta breathy, scratchy quality. It was like more pure. More earthy. Everyone else’s voice is so academic or fake. I mean fake in that they don’t know music and aren’t probably used to performing for fun. In college, in general, I was trying to finish General Studies online but didn’t succeed and became disinterested. I preferred the art class. I did learn a lot in English. It even helped me. It helped me know that I could succeed if given the resources and it helped with literature in music or singing, like knowing the history from like prehistory. So, as for acting, I mean, I can imagine just doing acting. With ballet, when I moved to Orlando in 2005-2007, I tried to go to the Orlando Ballet School, and they said Valencia and I didn’t like it and it didn’t work out for me. I just am not sure like because I mean I already did a year at Central Florida Ballet and though got the workout I was looking for (in teen ballet at age 19) was disappointed or dissatisfied. I had to take a break because I kept having to stay home and sleep. The psychiatric medicine made me big and clonky, so my growth was laborious, which I was hoping for, and I wasn’t so sleek. What I spend my time doing is blogging and posting on forums. I’m not sure what I’m leaving the rest of my virtual schedule open for, but I also know ballet ruins acting so that is probably why. Plus the long hours if I was a serious trainer, though that would supposedly build over a long period of time. I looked at UCF, and their acting is more serious than Rollins. I was interested in Film, probably the track that includes Directing, as opposed to a B.A. in Cinema Studies. Full Sail doesn’t have Directing. I don’t know if I should have looked into Computer Animation. So, I’m thinking of doing organ at Seminole since Valencia doesn’t have it. I assume I can also do tennis, not sure if the health clubs provide it. So, it seems like I’ve ruined my body, once again, before from staying up until 5 A.M. as a music major in the end. Now the medicine. I guess I “OD”-ed. They misdiagnosed me. I figured I had no way out. I didn’t want to argue. I just wanted the psychiatrist to tell me what to do. I didn’t know I’d lose my female thing and sleep so much. They even joked about giving me more medicine. The only problem is mainly that I guess I grew too quickly and in a bad way (maybe because of not having the right food) and losing my female thing for over a year, until I quit. I was very upset because when I came home from college to rest, kicked out of my major for being too inhibited supposedly, my female thing was thicker than before and was so thick and felt so magical and good and was like a part of me. Before, it used to hurt sometimes and leak. (I don’t mean that in an “offensive” way, whatever that means…) I was mad to take the medicine at 1st, but it’s partly interesting. The reason I quit ballet was so I’d grow, too, but I wanted to be tall and thin. I did grow, and I had grown.
Yes, I feel I’ve done a lot of exposure accompanying on the piano|keyboard|organ for singing mostly. It’s really a very good experience. It’s what helps me get into a play the most. I memorize the whole thing those times. When I’m in a play, I don’t enjoy that aspect. It’s more like a big project. I’ve only performed in theater at Slidell Little Theatre, which is where I used to live. I almost performed at Saint Mary Magdalene. They only liked my singing skill. I was supposed to dance, too, with an adult. They changed the schedule, and so I left. I saw another girl do it, and she gained weight and didn’t really look happy. She was younger than me. I also became a singer, and that’s always made me feel like I wasn’t even in this world, and it’s not necessarily the 1sttime. It even happens at the end. In Master Classes with an attractive leader, it had been an enlightening experience in the past. So, I like singing solos and accompanying including singing, especially when it comes to classical singing. I post myself on YouTube and singing. I found a place that sells legal karaoke. So, I post it on YouTube and post a link. I also sing the non-copyrighted songs I found out about doing singing in public all growing up. I always thought it’d be fun to be a dancer but feel for some reason it’s too late, you know like ballet or classical dancing. In New Orleans, I guess they might have had some kind of jazzy stuff, but they were strict on like ballet, piano. Not much in the way of like professional choir nor like upscale theatrical performances. They didn’t really showcase local Shakespeare, that I know and assume I’d have found out but maybe not. I think modern dance was the only big thing or rather dance team and for some it was cheerleading. There was a young Jew in my Talented Theater class in cheerleading, and I saw her when I was doing teen gymnastics. Later, I got in another gymnastics class. It wasn’t like a body pump. I guess it would be more conducive to an acrobatic atmosphere.
I think my strengths are at backing people up. At Saint Mary Magdalene, the boys I was doing the audition with looked like wow I feel so good with this girl acting. I guess that’s why I like accompanying and can sight read but more am about playing CHORDS AND MELODY. I don’t know about group singing. I always dreamed of this experience, and I became really really jealous of Charlotte Church and her assets as a person. I mean, she’s from Europe. She just is totally like sculpted as a person, like she’s a well-fed ballerina.
My weaknesses are probably that I wanted like a more professional experience, and I found some though they seemed a bit uptight. I guess I found it hard to like sorta open up to my peers. I find with the teacher that they’re more assertive and tell you what you need to know. You’re there to be with your peers. It’s like about performing for them. When it’s about people in general, it’s different. I guess I mean like in a setting with my peers and someone else like judging more objectively.
My fears as a performer are probably like is this really what I want to be doing? When will my options close? Does having a young mom make it hard for me to ever grow up?
My 1st impressions about the class are that it’s really a great class to learn how to think and like open up and see what’s really up, putting yourself in check. My feelings are that it’s a warm environment, a bit hard to reverberate in, rather quite funny.