"Times Change, People Don't"

Some people think I didn't care about popularity wishes in people.  People want to all count me out.  They pick people who have some thing in common and then only condone me on the category of that point.  I don't think it's right to be an animal about who gets to be touched.  I don't like how things are fabricated these days.  I have a disposition about where things are more affable.  It seems to have changed after the popularity of wishing you knew Tim Burton.  It's funny to see Helena Bonham Carter defend him but supposedly from 1 person, using that 1 person, and that 1 person is me, to get away with getting to be with and study him.  Yes, she does have 2 kids with him, 1 before Charlie and the Chocolate Factory (2005) and 1 after even Sweeney Todd (2007,) a boy and a girl.  I don't think because you live/d in California that you have to be piecey.  It must be something they've done.  It's about big guys who eat and go out and compliment pretty beach babes, feeding the kids and having a "real" life, whatever that means to them.

Late Boom Bribery

So, what do you think about the idea Ellen DeGeneres thinks my mom is a *** object?

She doesn't really mean she will accept kids with Early Boom dads, sorta bribing them like she's important and no one else matters because she's from New Orleans or her mom is.

I just kinda thought that with the way I present myself, that when I encounter people like her that the experience would be a better 1.  It's Tim Burton's fault.  I was even afraid to go online, but look how much trouble I got in for not posting about Charlie and the Chocolate Factory.

Noticing Things

So, today, I've noticed that people say something and conflict patterns.  That must be embarrassing, must trust in Charlie and the Chocolate Factory.

Problem

So, when I was 1 I think I felt fat.  I was a good girl.  I just was shy and people found that annoying, which was mean and showed they were wrong.  There was nothing I could say because they didn't connect with me as being more white than they thought because my ancestry dating back years ago...

Then, when I was 2, for some reason, I was kinda dark and fatter, still.  I had started gymnastics, already, though, so I dunno.  I don't know what I looked like in between.  I don't remember.  I think I felt like crap.  I probably went haywire like an Asian American.  Ha ha ha...

So, then the gymnastics made me strong and people "liked" me..

My brother was born when I was 5.  I was still in gymnastics.  I looked fatter I know when my hair was cut, which maybe it was cut before.  I started ballet, and my head got big.  By the way, I could never remember any of it.  I moved and didn't like the easy school.  So, I looked okay for awhile.  I think my cousin, who would only have been 1, wrote to me and I forgot to write back and I think that made me not get a blog when the internet came out.  I felt like knocked out, maybe by my mom, not to write back, and my dad didn't intercede.  So, he can't get mad.  That's true.  So, I know I looked pretty when I was 7 and did baton at Christmas.  However, I don't think I have the picture but may though my mom didn't develop any of the pictures I asked her to develop!  So, then, I was baton leader of little kids mostly and I started to look kinda old.  I did more gymnastics and quit ballet, and then I looked worse.  I guess I looked better at some point in the easy ballet school, or a bit after.  It was probably 1 of the best Christmas experiences, when I was 7.

So, then, I was 9, and I grew my bangs out.  My hair got thicker, somehow.  We lived by the water, directly on it this time.  It was also a preserved city, the nation's oldest.

I got fatter when I was 12 when I found I was moving.  I'm not sure who caused it.  I think it was my piano teacher.  I'm not sure, she must have been suggestive at weird things that happened, really bad.  I just really suspect her.  My mom had us not walk as much, though we walked to my piano recital, I think.

I started ballet and stayed in it so I wouldn't get scoliosis again.  I also was in martial arts, which seemed to help my weight a lot, just once a week, with grappling.  I also did tennis lessons with my brother and at 1st my mom, too, used to do it with a friend, too.

So, I switched ballet schools and for some reason got more plump, also trying to become cuter.  My friend encouraged me.  It did teach me more classical, puppety ballet, but not like classical puppets..

16, I had a hard lecture reading history course in gifted because it was combined with advanced placement, which is for the advanced placement test for college credit, which isn't actually that popular.  I went to the mental hospital and gained weight even before.  I was losing weight a lot and was not bony but thin.

17 I moved schools and was really busy and got into music college.

I was kicked out of my major, probably for staying up until 5, and my grades were marked down.  So, I couldn't move schools and was at a prestigious college on a high scholarship for a specific study.  It also had ballet that performs, which I didn't perform my 1st year, for some reason.  Then, I went up north and something happened to my back and I started eating sweets.  I came home and my parents didn't let me eat baby food and formula because it had cost a lot.  I got fat.  So, I went and did ballet and didn't go to the gym and because of that I got even fatter, unless I didn't know it was because I got fat when I came home.  That kind of thing has happened before.  Also, the construction made it so I couldn't study, and there was no material the same on the test as in the reading, anyway.  Next semester, I heard noises in my ear that made me want to commit suicide.  I was crawling to get back in my major, and the stuck up people in New Orleans still were being racist because of Johnny Depp and Charlie and the Chocolate Factory.  It so happens the history course was during Pirates of the Caribbean.  I didn't see the ads at the movies I went to, which were the popular 1s.

So, I came home and I was so tired going out and had to stop going out and had some problems with my head from how my dad drove, though I think buses and taxis would drive like that and I wanted to be a movie actor or like you know do whatever I was supposed to otherwise to start to become 1 in the business.  Like I wanted to work at a restaurant in L.A. but assume that's overrated.  Anyway, it was really mean how my dad drove.  It might have helped, like injuries can help.  I know music and coming home and relaxing for once in my life made me sensitive to noise.  I did ballet for awhile.  I got thinner, but I wanted to get taller and I guess it was fun not to do it and it wasn't a great school, though it provided a sweat.  I forget what else I was gonna say, oh, yea, I wanted to sleep in.  So, we moved to a house since there was noise all the time more and more, like every 15 seconds, even a lot at night, if not that much.  I didn't think to wear earplugs but had a fan.  I stayed in my room a lot and ate what my parents got, but I didn't even go outside until my mom presented me with keys, guess it might have been too late.  Then, I went to the mental hospital, supposedly for punching my wall, going to a spa and trying to get blackheads out which ruined plugs that were happening in my forehead and then I thought in an experiment I was supposed to call a girl toddler the n word, also thought the spa lady hypnotized me to do it for not talking more about the internet.  I was telling her how I got blackheads.  I was on a lot of medicine for a long time and finally found a reason to quit.  It made me even fatter and weaker and kinda like nothing mattered, ever since the n word thing, when Tim Burton stopped pretending to post online to me.  Since then, a few complications have occurred.

So what I have to say about that is it would just be when I was 8 when I didn't write my cousin that I looked ugly and when I was 5 and started ballet.  It was because I did gymnastics, too, not sure "what" happened to the other girls.  I mean, it was like I knew what was wrong.  I didn't cheat and say oh I did nothing all my life so am free for ballet, you know?  Like not doing gymnastics is what makes you good at ballet.

I went to the mental hospital when I was 16 with that hard history course, too.  I was fat after that, affected from it.  Only a week.  Here I went a month.

Reading ... and Writing

I guess that I was a good reader.  My mom said I talked a lot.

So, I did gymnastics, ballet, and baton at 7.

Er, 8, I did more gymnastics and baton.  I read the whole thing of the Zoo Books magazines, maybe around 7 of them.

Then, I got the boxed set of the Little House books and read them more than once at 9.  I would linger on the text.  I also was reading American Girls, which were short booklets.  I think that's when people drew from me reading a lot.  However, when I was 7 and 8, we got books read to us, a lot.  When I was 8, it turned out people were already reading novels, however.

We moved when I was 12, and I read The Secret Garden, A Little Princess, a fantasy about a unicorn, and the books for the reading program at school.  I did the homework.

I read some books that became movies, 1 being Harry Potter.  I read The Phantom of the Opera.  I'm not sure what I spent my free time doing.  I know I was either on vacation, working|schooling, or doing something in the arts, each summer.

I read The Tale of Despereux, my 1st year of college, got it from a book fair order through my brother.  I didn't even watch the movie but posted on Facebook.  I hadn't been going out.

I did read Charlie and the Chocolate Factory and the sequel, as well as Alice in Wonderland for the 3rd or 4th time.  I read it all in 1 morning and afternoon.  I also read the 2nd book, maybe the next day, unsure.  I read through a book on the illustrator of Alice in Wonderland, and the word, "fastidious," came up more than once.

Reading online posts on IMDb and when I was elsewhere was a task.  The posts online just keep coming, and people expect them to be answered.  I wrote so much, people didn't pay attention to me, and I went and got a blog and just posted, apparently, about what I was doing, my problems, like with technology, about eating, stuff like that that goes on and on like a book..

I also spent a lot of time reading these 2 booklets with illustrations on personality types, the 2 major sorters.  I got some guides on specific types on my Nook and read through what I was interested in, which wasn't much.  That's when I was 12, too, maybe until I was 15.  They were really boring, but I'm pretty good at sorting and could sort out like something about dominant and secondary functions.  I think you sort all 4 letters.  I also read through what I was interested in in a longer text book of the major personality sorting type.
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There was another popular 1 I can't find now about your dog or cat personality, came out in 1997 I think.  I read it and realized it was colored, racist people.  I got it in the past recent years.

So, I started reading, I think, Twilight, and I realized it was for kids.  I got another magical book that I found was from years ago.  So, I stopped.

Now, I'm trying to get back blogging skills and see if I can get as smart as I was when I was a tween.

I know there are young children's authors out there, but I didn't think those books were for me.  I wanted to read about true ghost stories, might get that.  I don't know about writing for skill.  That's something like poetry.  I dunno, maybe online articles are of some value.  Remember essays?  Maybe long psychology essays, mainly on like modern young people, like when MySpace was coming out, you know?  It doesn't sound like people want to make people happy and talk about it.  They just smile sarcastically and go on to something else.  It's something they do a lot.  They have that funny aura..

I had also been getting People on my Nook, and it's easy to go through and read.  It's mostly ads.  It's every week for $10 a month, I think.

TV Show Host

I was thinking, did you ever consider that there should be a cross between eggs and tofu?  Ellen DeGeneres is a vegan and so has accessed the smorgasbord of "what" the world has to offer, dietwise.  Also, what's her thing with short hair?  I guess it means something.  It's funny how people with short hair aren't all equal.  I know I grew up with short hair but not very short hair.  I guess I didn't grow up with short hair.  I mean, I wanted to look like a princess, and it was popular to look like a movie star.  I even cut my bangs.  Ellen DeGeneres isn't that styled.  I bet she thinks she's better with short hair.  It's not more old-fashioned.

Can you imagine her at the beach?  I can't do it!  *runs away*

I can't really imagine her doing anything.  She's just a figment of desire.

What about her dancing?  I have to see if she used to dance.

So, who is she appealing to now?  She used to be with Generation X.  Now, Charlie and the Chocolate Factory changed the world.  It looks like she went through a transition stage.  What about annoying Elle Fanning?  She is born in 1998, and she made a mature impression.  However, she makes it seem like we have to be like her.  I agree she was a sweet toddler.  She became sarcastic.  She seems racist, like everyone else.

Problem

My dad is really bad, really mean, like in a hidden way, thinks it's okay for certain reasons, 1st seeing Johnny Depp in Charlie and the Chocolate Factory directed by Tim Burton, then me not being able to do well in college partly because my life became an experiment and no one was direct with me, like it was to balance the situation.  Then, I used store cards and thought in the experiment I was supposed to call someone the n word.

Problem

Didn't I already make a blog post, buried somewhere... anyway, no one responds to this in my life.  I don't know about categorizing things like this.  So, I got mad, locked in my room, because of New Orleans and then Orlando, after Charlie and the Chocolate Factory, felt totally tortured, and e-mailed people nicely.  My dad rattled on that I called them niggers, like it mattered..  I think, 1st, someone stopped, or maybe it was someone else.  Well, I think, then, I got mad at a girl, but she was acting racist.  I know it's improper, and I wanted her to talk to me more.  I don't remember what I said, but I didn't say, "You're a nigger," or, "I'm gonna *beep* you."  I used to write more very, very detailed.

Oh, and no one would admit she was really being racist.  It was very contrived.  You know, they just rattle on about morals and being white, and they're part Native American indian, like Johnny Depp.  I might be.  Wow, but they don't really mean it but will rattle on more.  They're like balloon heads.  I don't think this is the right way to talk about something, but I guess we should have started writing sooner.

I don't know what about Johnny Depp in Charlie and the Chocolate Factory directed by Tim Burton strikes a nerve with you.  You're gonna have to be taken in and realize this is your problem and that I don't approve of this problem, which I see in everyone I meet very strongly.  You'll just have to get out of my life, in this way.  Help!  Someone do something.  The police aren't listening.  They're invading me with messages.