Saturday, September 26, 2015

Halloween Costume

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$20 @ Wal-Mart

Goth Vampire

Gothic Vamp Adult Halloween Costume

Small Blog

Autism

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"Kids with autism often can't make connections that other kids make easily. For example, when people smile, you know they feel happy or friendly; when people look mad, you can tell by their face or their voice. But many kids who have autism spectrum disorders have trouble understanding what emotions look like and what another person is thinking. They might act in a way that seems unusual, and it can be hard to understand why they're doing it."

In some ways, I do inappropriate things as a reaction.  However, I come here to say that I used to wave and say, "hey," to people in 1997 and 1998 when I was in 6th grade just before moving from Florida to Louisiana.  I had no "good" friends.. but wasn't "unpopular," at all, in a way.

Feeble

Can't eat much.  I thought some bread and pasta would be okay but guess not.

Being Good or Bad

Why would you treat me like I'm a bad person usually if I'm not?  You could just treat me like I'm usually a good person who did something bad but didn't do it again.

'Can't do much.

I am sick of TV right now and my back hurts from eating too much last night, some.  I'm on pain killers.  I live to watch The Ellen DeGeneres Show and otherwise would be in school.  I already wanna be a famous performer.  I'm going for acting, preferably on a "talk" show or very cool movie.

Why I'm at Home

I'm also on psychotic pills that make me tired.

Yay for Bella

Sometimes, Bella Thorne is the only interesting person on, I can see why she should bump into others.

No and Go

True, I did *something I didn't mean in a bad way to an innocent person, I used the word m*********.  You could say no and go.  It's pathetic to just keep me as is to bash me over and over until you're worn out.

*Thanks a lot to misinterpreting things as sarcastic and not saying what words you can't use.  I just forgot what I was doing cuz I was being abused.  How silly of me.  I learned thru rejection.  It was obvious it was a joke, in a way, but I guess not, a stupid thing to say among strangers.  I'm sorry, but they won't stop bringing it up.. funny, in a funny way, too.  I think that people who get away with mistakes, little or big ones, are considered still on the wrong track, so they treat me robotically like I'd do that.  With all the craze, I guess that's what starts things like that, unless you already can be diagnosed with a psychotic "mental" disorder. People treat me crazily, and I know it threw me off without looking.  I was aware before moving to Orlando, I'd be perfectly sane.

How You're Treated

Are some people treated with care and others not?

Is it easy to say that makes a difference in what others think of your intentions?

It's safe to say the world treats people certain ways and this is usually the biggest issue to solve in anyone's lives, how the world treats you, which means their opinion on your parents's marriage, your race, your hair and eye color, etc.

I just applied to be on..

Hollywood Game Night.

Josh Groban was on it.

Rats!

I wanted to get on SNL!

Dreamed Bigger?

I came up with a theory.  I accomplish so much and it is real accomplishment but gets tossed.

What's Trashed

It seems all the great musicals are trashed that were once glorified to my generation.

New Picture of Me

Edit

I enlarged the picture in the last post.

Ellen + Bella!

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Ellen + Bella

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Bella Thorne!

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New Orleans

So..

What can I do to prevent these little bad things from happening?

I have a bigger picture, too.  I guess any thing like this is big.

...

Never get too mad without thinking.  I was actually frustrated at complex feelings, part of it, and unfortunately was experiencing negative repercussions, to be honest, well, maybe good to say in case I did.  I don't remember the negative thoughts but I ran across something, a feeling, I did not deal with and it just made it happen later not knowing why, it seemed.  It's been happening.  I need to get over myself? Well, with this issue.

I feel an onslaught of issues I cannot deal with.  I'm just a preppy girl trying to stay positive and live a normal life, in ways.. this hits me like a turtle shell.  If I have an issue with people in my mind is one thing, usually happier in public.  Just an explanation of that point of view.  And then in that turtle shell is a very thick skull.  In some ways, I don't do much in there but have some memories left.

IMDb - Hotel Transylvania 2 (2015)

Re: Let's keep track of the IMDb rating for Hotel Transylvania 2

😃 Cool! It's hard to remember if I was able to see the 1st one. I usually caught all the animations.

Yes, I saw it today.

This was a brilliant installment! ðŸ˜€

I saw the Box Trolls and even got the novel and book it's based on. That was great. I need to buy it. 

Twitter

Story

"Once upon a time," there was a girl named Sahra.  She was 30 years old.  She lived in a land of "witches" and wizards.

There was a big house where she lived.  Every day there were grand parties.  She had a room to herself wherein she was able calmly to be.

She longed to be an adult, sufficient and grown her age.  She was "still a child" to some but to others didn't matter.

She wore a gray kid's dress.

Downstairs each night there was a party downstairs where damsels played and talk, witches.  Wizards were outside doing big complex things and later also had their own bash.

Sahra went downstairs.  She saw a kind of lady she wanted to be able to see named Isabel who was 50.  She was very shy, as she sidled along, lonesome! and depressed.  Isabel, so, picked her up as she was a full grown, strong woman, very attractive and active in the world and apparently in good physical shape, as well, felt good and was a more physical presence, like a great dancer or athlete in spirit, yet versed in the arts.

Sahra was not fully grown and so as a person she was rather meek and bony and shorter.  She was very sensitive and apparently lost herself in this connection to Isabel.

Meanwhile, there is a cute girl named Angelica who was loud and commanding and had a hold on everything.  She was 13 and went around the house like it was a party.  Isabel picked her up to and in the process brought her up to bed where she slept with her, as they were used to from before when sleeping in the immigration bunks.  Angelica, she was quite a baby.  She stayed up with her eyes going in and out of focus and the others in bed laughed as they talked and Isabel calmed her to bed.

(I think I'm gonna keep Isabel.)

Another girl there was named Helga, and she was 15.  She stayed up late and woke up at the last of the morning, tho she did not particularly enjoy her nights.  She stayed  up in the theater watching musicals where they danced and sang.  It was amazing!  She could not seem to do it.  It was too tiring.

Morning came, and Margaret told Helga to wake up with her "mom" Cassima.  Helga was grumpy but woke up.  School was out, so she was happy.  Margaret is a lovely girl!  She is 14.  She has a best friend named Carrie, who is 16.  Carrie had a long pointed noise and twinkling blue and crystally eyes.  Margaret was small and bubbly with a sweet grin.  Isabel also came in and asked the girls, "What's cookin'?"  Margaret said, "Oh, just waking up!  Ah ha ha!"  Carrie looked sideways and kept to herself, as she was rather shy.

Sahra was 30 and felt old but too young.  Life looked bleak, as she stared off into the distance.  She was never bad, but she sometimes felt she amounted to no good and could not see any way out of her present life.  She went up to the school, and no one was there.  She took an online course and completed a degree in Counseling.  She 1st mentored an aspiring actress who was 40 and a little kid who was 4.  She turned on and smiled pretty for the lovely little girl with her.  She at least got the actress to laugh.

I want to get a tadpole!

I can get one here.

Wal-Mart

Lighted Habitat

$20

Backyard Safari Land and Water Lighted Habitat

I need to clean it and know what kind of water it can take, 1st.

I saw 2 tadpoles come up for air in a row and I saw their eyeballs and they are really cute.  1 was big and 1 was small.

I've even seen tadpoles in a puddle on the sidewalk.

Stuffed Animals

I wanna keep them but send them packing for now.

Cabbage Patch Pets

Cabbage Patch Pets - $20 @ ToysRUs
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If I had 1 pet to hold thru the years it'd be this now.

Jealousy in the Family

I think there is jealousy in my extended family about being the youngest and most ideal.  No offense, but it'd come out on topic sooner or later somehow.. maybe.  Maybe, there isn't anything to talk about, tho.  I just had that very problem.  It's probably the same situation.

Rugrats?

Are children today the ideal as tho Rugrats?  The people who voiced them are the age of their parents.

Problem

If someone tells me to d**, bad thoughts will make me mad and jump at me like I said something.  What can I do?!  No, I don't want to., some thoughts are complex and more specifically something else unexpected.

What's making me mad is the way I think of things, words, I don't usually and don't mean to.. tho I have in the past about stress.. and then the people experimenting on me know and get upset.

Am I gonna..

Am I supposed to be/gonna think about something here?

Being Black and Not White

Why are black people mad at me for being white when they think about wanting to be black?

Stupid

I get grouped as stupid for being mixed race.

The Ellen DeGeneres Show

The 1st thing I remember is the cool lady from NYC being filmed in her home live.  She was hyper for like 10 minutes.

Wanda Sykes was on again, an incredibly intelligent black woman, very funny, too.

There was another guy, and then they played a game with him and Wanda Sykes.  We saw Ellen was never drunk before noon in a game, and she joked like she was drunk right then.

Experiment

Why would you put me in an experiment like I had problems behaving and do mean things to me just to make me feel I'm bad? and then act like you're teaching me to be good?

Friday, September 25, 2015

I wonder..

..what I did wrong.

I didn't mean anything bad to anyone I thought was innocent, I know, and even if not tried maybe.

It was a technical thing I did that I needed to change technically.  My intents were not "wrong."  If they were, correct me here.

Punishment Okay but Want Me to Put Thoughts on Screen?

I dunno who all would be interested, but I think I'm in trouble because I thought of curse words and something else about it I don't remember.  Anyway, I'd rather hold off on this "what if."

I guess I was supposed to behave not like my usual self.

No, no one said, "Christina, the Emmys are listening in on you when they start, when you eat supper with your family/parents."  So, what?  I didn't say to broadcast my cursing, neither..

I usually think of curse words with my parents and at the table, but I try to go in and not.

Another habit was to think of, "No," as I hit my utensils.

No one cares about me, and so I'm not much, not much of a daughter tho wanted to be..  I just feel too hurt by things.

It feels something was just chiseled out of me.

Tier

I feel I can support myself mentally and emotionally over others, and I don't think anyone can stop me just by how they act, concerning my success in the world itself.

Small Blog

Mothers and Daughters

http://psychcentral.com/lib/15-insights-on-improving-mother-daughter-relationships/

This is probably applicable to any relationship, especially between an older woman and a younger girl/lady..

"Don’t wait for the other person to make the first move"

True, get a blog, and start letting out your feelings in a productive way..  You'll probably touch on these feelings..

"you aren’t chained to their actions"
"Interestingly, this can still alter your relationship."

This is called being independent and not relying too much on others.  It was a common thing when I was a teenager.

It seems more I'm in older brother sister relationships than ever the idea of a mother or father, which is fine in a lot of ways or how I usually/used to try to function.

"Set boundaries."

No one listens.  The lack of boundaries is an opportunity to turn the other person inside out or "to get it over with," if you will.

If..

If I feel like solving a problem is that okay if it's not to change the punishment?

Ellen Article

http://www.yahoofeed.com/7-reasons-to-admire-ellen-degeneres

It's funny when Ellen's family thinks highly of her.  I mean, like more than most people.

"Are you a fan of her shows? What is the thing you like about her the most?"

Yes.  I liked her intelligence..

My Comment I Left:

"Christina Barrett - http://www.christinabarrett.com - I think she is a great person, relates well to others."

IMDb - The Soapbox

Re: "Power corrupts"

Some people can just see good and bad. They keep it in that perspective and know the bad will plea they are good. 

*sigh*

I tried to get my mom on Ellen, but I see Stephen Colbert and Jimmy Fallon do not have options to be on their show.

Is there an emotional virus going around?

Like, if your parents aren't as emotional as you are you are to remain silent?

Upset?

Just upset at me anyway?

I said what I said for a reason, not to be pompous.

Contest

There should be some contest to get to know Ellen DeGeneres, for crying out loud!

IMDb - The Soapbox

Re: From fast food places my ideal meal

Well, yea, Sonic is good..but Dairy Queen brings back memories. I used to walk there for like 45 minutes with my mom and little brother, maybe him in a stroller. That was when we lived in the nation's oldest continuing city, too, so we passed downtown to the modern area. Downtown stuff is all walking distance small. Too bad it's so small, but there are hidden mysteries..

Okay, I think Taco Bell too, too. 

"You Have To" - Ha Ha

You have to check someone's blog to let them express themselves..OR Facebook or famous people on Twitter.

I am talking in general!!  No one else is talking to me.

cont.

I'm stuck here.

You think..

..I'm the beat up man in the Good Samaritan.

It seems like..

..I can't talk about anything.

cont.

I have a point!  I just said something impersonal about feelings.  I was talking about talking, which I usually have to.  People hate me when I do that rather than have I ever had an answer.

Just forget it like you?

and find happiness?

cont.

"Complaining about being considered bad?"

Then, how are you supposed to fix yourself and get on with a life?!

It mustn't be..

It mustn't be that important to anyone.

Popular?

Just trying to be popular..

Well, set your example, already.

If the people experimenting on me said I just did something, they are lying and being racist.

Any negativity?

Um, like what, saying something bad someone did to you?

Complaining about being considered bad?

Come on, does anyone wanna talk or have anything to say?

A lotta people don't have a blog nor vlog.

Some people have a problem even in this post.  Maybe, they are grammar queens/kings.

Candy Bar Doll

Funny..

Funny, my dad thinks if I feel something, like, in the negative (could be just something small or sad or whatever) about anyone else that he gets to "play" with me and do whatever he wants.

Asia is Asia

Mongoloid is Mongoloid.  It doesn't have to be pretty if it's not.  Mongoloid is Mongoloid.  It's the old Asian/Oriental.  India is like Egypt, not Chinese.

Too Late

I should have even known in high school what I was doing.  I shouldn't have gone to a real college but a music conservatory.  I saw at least one with general studies, tho, not sure about the rest.

Problem

Why didn't I know it was better to take a light course load in college?  I felt challenged and threatened.  In the end, I found college was too hard when I got into the regular general studies courses, freaked out and didn't even consider to withdraw, like I still had a chance.

IMDb - The Soapbox

Re: From fast food places my ideal meal

Hamburger-TGIF
Fries-McDonald's
Soda-?
Desert-Dairy Queen 

Colbert

I tried to turn to him.  I see he took over Letterman, as my dad said.

People who are really worked up who..

..engage them directly in childcare services seem to expect the clock to turn around and have people baby them at sloping up middle age.  Just toot the horn and wait for the next runner to cut the ribbon.

What if you made it so someone is trapped and can't do it for attention?

IMDb - The Soapbox

Re: It's Friday and I'm horny, ask me anything!

Do you like South Asians? 

When should I watch Jimmy Fallon?

Who knows, maybe this weekend, maybe the next.. unless I feel like resting with the TV

He has a great show, a great takeover as successor to Jay Leno.

New Picture of Me

Thursday, September 24, 2015

IMDb - Johnny Depp

His introverism is a turn-off

Look, I know some people are introverted, but as Larry David said, he has shy/a**hole confusion with introverts. Are they shy? Or are they just a**holes who don't like other people?

I'm not sure with him. Regardless, I find him to be too quiet, too reserved, and a lot of his movie choices aren't my style. Plus his quasi-british accent often a trait of people who look down on americans, or think themselves better than americans.

Re: His introverism is a turn-off

a lot of his movie choices aren't my style
You hit the nail on the head. He is floating post-par.

29/f/Orlando

Re: His introverism is a turn-off

post-par? Is that like punching above his weight?

Re: His introverism is a turn-off



It's like the water line is the par other actors live on and he's decided to float just on top of where they are.

29/f/Orlando

Approval

Does my dad think badly of someone if they approve of me?

Problem

I didn't have a loving school environment with friends to keep me in check, like others.

I used to curse about noises in my room.. now, one little thing, and it could just be over, after things must be at stake for me, at least emotionally.

Some people enjoy having power but not an understanding.

Edit

The Heartbreak post was on my Small Blog.

"Safe With Computers"

A lotta women around the turn of the century, like 1999, 2000, thought going back to "computers" is "safe" because it controls so much, not because it's the most satisfying nor maybe rewarding career..  People made fun of that but make silly assumptions all the time, before and after this time.

So, it seemed, but people really did say computers were safe, as a job or career path to strive towards.  "Computer science."

Small Blog

Heartbreak

Heartbreak happens in many forms, not just in breaking up..

http://elitedaily.com/dating/spectrums-love/770434/

"Despite everything this person did to you, you would do anything for him or her, if need be."

People tend to cut others off when others need them more..  (It's because it's like "what" a master needs of his slave.  The person cutting the other off is the slave master.  For the other, it's like becoming a "slave to love."  It's a mystery why it happens, but some people know.  One idea I have is racism.)

Request to be on The Ellen DeGeneres Show

I am from Southeastern and Northeastern Florida. I moved to Slidell, LA, by New Orleans when I was 12. When I was 15, I started playing organ for church with only piano as prior lessons. When I was 16, we had a new exciting priest and music director. The music director was always so sweet and had an astounding personality. She was a petite woman who was 49 at the time. If I'm not mistaken she's there still. I used to help her make copies at 1st. She eventually taught me organ. She made it such a wonderful experience to be a part of the music ministry. It's a Catholic church. She also let me play keyboard for youth mass, which was a valuable and heartfelt experience, with some other young people. She was always there for everyone, very competent and together with everything. She was so attractive. Some things she did was host a Christmas party and for me a going away party when I went off to college, where I studied some organ myself. I know she is from New Orleans. She taught in the suburbs. She is just so sweet, artistic, fancy, attractive, and smart. She deserves a lot! My life took a 90 degree turn with her in it. I just never told her. Instead of wandering, I felt I had a place in the world. She is so caring and stern for the right things. She gets people in order and knows what she's doing. She makes sure people are happy. She's serious and gets down to business.

I am from Southeastern and Northeastern Florida. I moved to Slidell, LA, by New Orleans when I was 12. I mostly was in Catholic schools. I went mostly to a public school. In my 3rd year, I started Talented Theater. We had this very attractive teacher. She had a French last name and was very quirky and artistic, like Tim Burton. She was vibrant and did belly dancing and still does. She is from New Orleans and teaches in the suburbs. She was just so inspirational, down to get work done but also very caring. I used to stay after class and help put away books. She even mentored me sometimes. She is part of the reason for keeping me going in a tough time, and I miss going to school there a lot. She was so sweet to me, very smart and very innovative and knowing the truth of things. She can be disciplinary, and she can be outright fun. She was like a sister. Some younger people thought she was my mom, since I was helping her I think. She was very good introducing is to theater things. She knew when things were important to us and stuff and talked to us. It was fun doing the classroom theater activities, like children. We did some interesting things. I also got to have credit for vocals for the seniors in the senior play for assisting and playing music with the pit orchestra between acts. She really knows what she's doing and is a great service and person. She's very inspirational. She's just so uplifting. I loved talking to her after class sometimes.

I moved to Orlando when I was 19. I was very shy and usually away at college. Finally, at home here in Orlando with my parents, I found a theater teacher in 2012 and took class Spring 2013. She is such an amazing lady. She taught voice to the people at Disney World, like accents, Universal, etc. She is originally from Santa Clara, California. She has taught here since the 1980s. She had 3 theater classes lined up, and I took them all. She is so vibrant and exciting and fun to be with. She had us doing all sorts of fun activities. We were on the floor, we were jumping off tables and things. We told stories on command, etc. We went in the theater and did some vocal things. The really fun thing is after I stopped taking the classes, I came and took voice lessons from her over one summer. She taught me musical theater songs and gave my voice more confidence. She's such a sweet lady and can be so selfless. She must be a wonderful actress. She's very exciting and interesting. She specializes in the voice. She used to teach a group singing class, too. She looks so spunky and riveting. She's energetic and very humorous. It's such a blessing to be in her presence. She really has a lot going.

Isn't ANYONE on here f-cking sick and tired of.

Miley's spam?    

Like, for real?? 
I don't understand you morons, she's a boring as hell spammer.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Race,_Evolution,_and_Behavior

Re: Isn't ANYONE on here f-cking sick and tired of.

It feels like there is pressure concerning her from other posters who fuel her, probably in ways she does not like. The place isn't the same. It's like The Lion King after Mufassa died, no offense.

29/f/Orlando

IMDb - The Soapbox

Re: The worst pizza I have ever had is UNO

I used to always have Pizza Hut at the restaurant when I was 2. It was quite a materialistic experience.. I can't taste it anymore like then. I just have a memory of the dark red style the place had, fancy and dimly lit.

My parents had UNO's pizza when they were pregnant with me. 1st time, I didn't like it, but it's pizza. 

Music

The pianist is Jewish.  Her mom is from Italy, and her dad is from Africa.  She is from France.  She lived in Tallahassee, Florida, US, as well, with her boyfriend.  She is born in 1969.

26:05-end

The Ellen DeGeneres Show

I remember the 3 little dancing brunettes dancing to some of R.E.S.P.E.C.T.  3 dancing girls just means so much.  It was very good!

The black actress winner of the Emmy was great!  The clip of her acting was very good.  She held her look or "stare" well for a long time, mostly not moving much.  She just wanted to have fun when she was on Ellen.  She had eaten lots of McDonald's french fries, too.

The dude was cute, too, I thought.  It made me think of how older people than me like their ways and just use people like me if they have to.

The contest at 1st looked embarrassing, being hit with Angry Birds and spinning slowly..  She was of dark complexion, nice girl.

The last contest of musical chairs with 3 black girls looked fun.

Cuts

I got 4 "cuts" in the past few days from stretched skin.

cont.

and I don't have dry hands.

cont.

I would imagine things I felt or saw in real life, and it went over big.  I didn't go coo coo nor anything.  I felt a little pain when someone from up north did something.  When I went up north, somewhere else, I experienced pain in some form, too.  Coming back to Orlando then, I also felt pain in some similarity.

No M***********

It is an interesting thing now that I didn't when I didn't live in Florida.

Is it all the *** going around?

Anyway, I had a much more vivid sensitivity to feeling outside of Florida.  Well, I was in Louisiana, by New Orleans..

Disney World

The only upscale thing to do in Orlando, tho it may seem different for some residents.

Disney World

Raining all this week and next week.  Hurricane season.

What was it in New Orleans?  The zoo.

Problem



Tonight, prepare to feel the music of the... crosswalk.
Posted by The Late Late Show with James Corden on Wednesday, September 23, 2015


Are they making fun of me?  So what if I met the Phantom and it's posted up on YouTube where anyone can easily find it?  What, does he deserve everything and I deserve nothing?

Twitter

I discovered a fact.

Dr. Phil is is adamant about using the word "mother."

Concerning Dr. Phil, I mean to embody terms like "tender."  He wants to match the quality of a female in female things.

New Picture of Me