Wednesday, February 4, 2015

Dr. Phil - Facebook

I was lied to about my mom cuz I heard at 1st she was fine and then she was thought to be dying from bone and breast cancer.  Coincidentally, she just had surgery on her right eye for a detached retina.  Even more coincidentally, she said 2 car accidents put pressure on the side of her eye/s and made her wear glasses.  I don't think my mom should be in glasses, now.

Another coincidence for me to bear in mind was once it just came out of me to say to the music teacher's daughter in 4th grade, "I'd rather go blind than wear glasses," when she got glasses.  Also, when my mom got glasses, I said someone caused it who got really mad cuz I said they were m.. in pleasure of my mom's getting glasses.  After that, she had her detached retina.

Another coincidence is I had styes or pimples on my eye.  It still gets more red and along the line it looks pink, my lower left eye.

I took the drug Risperdal for schizophrenia, which I do not have, but I was told.  I lost my period and was so sad.  I got off it, but it's very light.  Supposedly, it's a small tumor under my brain from the brain scan, on the pituitary gland..  When I 1st went to the mental hospital, I said, "Don't give me any medicine."  They said okay but called my dad and got permission.  I moved and went back to another mental hospital which was much much worse and even very bad, for adults this time, and the Asian doctor said I had it only because they said I had it before, tho they told me they "just put it down" for now and after a little while on the pills I'd be off most likely, "cuz they didn't wanna see me with medicine."  We moved to a Chinese doctor, my mom and I, and he said I had no problems and nothing was wrong with me.  I asked for something for my digestion, and he gave me these like large marble sized balls to chew on.  I was 16, 3rd year of high school.  I was called to the counselor probably for being more laid back and losing my 4.0.  I used to be in more activities, a lotta them, clubs etc.  The counseling got in the way of physics and math.  They thought I could just catch up and learn at home I bet.  I think I still held an A or B in those classes then.

That girl lying about cancer?  The medical world is mighty fuzzy.  Sometimes, I just say I lost my period, but no one gives a care.  It used to be heavy and pleasurable after I took a break from school.

Also, my mom and I tried to get medical withdrawals so far with no luck from a failed semester of college here in Orlando at the community college online.  My complaint is that I was supposed to be on a break from college according to my real college.  So, I wanted an excuse for missing the withdrawal deadline.  They didn't even wink an eye.  They were just set on keeping their record neat.  There really was something funny in the air.  I felt it consume me.  I never miss withdrawal deadlines but for twice.  The other 6 times, no.  I got withdrawals then.  It was really because I fell apart when I lost my major in music: singing, music education, and piano as a major instrument.  I just could not think, didn't practice, and lost energy for summer school and so on.  I was withdrawn by others twice, as well, those working in the school offices.  They claimed I was not well.  No one ever convinced me it was okay to take a small load, as tho it wouldn't impress or maybe wasn't enough work.  I just ended up like this.  Even when they tried to recommend me less work, like in high school I wasn't convinced they still thought I was as amazing.  The mental hospital just woke me up and I later wanted to change schools and I did and got the grade, changed twice.  A total of 4 high schools, technically.  1 an arts school on the side for me more.

I can say that my doctor at the time of my Fs said I had fatigue.  They didn't think it was enough, all the saying I needed a break.  Now, the meds I don't need make me tired and I am attempting to go back, again.  My mom says I have to take the meds if I live here, tho it probably gave me the diabetes.  :(