What is it..

..that being mean to me is the desirable word in?  You can't live in fear.  You can live without me, tho.  You already kinda have.

It's not like I don't know

Little things are being done to hurt me and I have no peace of mind.  I get bombarded with secret insults from annoying people.

Imagine some young lady getting all pissed and cursing about others as she goes about her day.

Why

are people being mean to me?  I don't know if I even wanna watch Ellen.

If I struck a nerve..

..that wasn't what I meant to anyone..

So

I don't mean to bother anyone, but why am I always in trouble?  You all have no right to lie to me and treat me that way.

Worried

They threatened to kill someone cuz a car made me turn my head this morning.

Now, they said to kill me!  Why do they think they can talk to me like that?

OK OK

I know Ellen is touchy about Bella.  I don't want her to think I did something to her, tho.

Strange

Sarah Brightman's voice got different.  I'm not sure what she should do.

Looking

I'm looking up the person who loaded 2 videos online.

I wonder who else

looks up Sarah Brightman concerts, like the tours that don't get sold on tape.  Who knows!  There are more views this year now she's in Europe.  That can only mean a good thing.

Time

I feel I have a strange experience checking for Sarah Brightman online.  Who knows, she may quit one day or when she's in space we'll see if it's really her.

I know

I can't decide what others do, so I should not be an animal about it.

Happy but Hurt

I want other people to experience the relationships I've had in the limelight, so-to-speak.

Talking.. Where It Went Wrong

Well, for Bella, I feel as though she wanted to get me in trouble and treat me that way like my dad.

Something Else That Is Unforgiveabe

I'm not going thru a ritual of punishment.  I didn't do anything.  What you think I did doesn't even deserve that.  I could tell the police.  Too bad I have a history of mental illness and hospitalization, lies.

I was giving in..

..but these people won't stop talking about Bella with Ellen and Sarah.

Insults

You all keep acting insulting to me.  They said my apologies were worthless.

Do you want me to say I feel offended, like Bella is taking my place in some obscure way and like people think I should be in trouble?

What am I supposed to say I am sorry for?  I'm not bowing to Bella.

Lies

Ellen attacked me.  I just defended myself.  She thinks it's okay to be mean to me, too.

because..

Because Ellen did it is not looking so bright and merry.

My Life

My dad has always seemed suggestive to me racially and now lives in the style that I am definitely in trouble when I didn't do anything worth that.  A car wooshed by sounding like my being nice to Bella Thorne was worthless because it was an overstatement, tho I feel pushed to give her undivided attention.