Everything I say

is overstating the obvious.  It's not to stay like that now.

I'm afraid the UK..

..is ***.

I'm not into making all these fantasy suggestions for not having English blood.  I'm a mix of Anglo and East European.

People are going dead in to humiliate me by suggesting things to my mom for thoughts she's had.

Yes, I am a talker.  It doesn't mean I'm negating what you think.  I'm not a "bad girl."  I am a romantic personality type, tho.  So, I find myself in between being popular and being an outcast, if that strikes a fancy in you.  Is that part a big deal?  I think you just judge people for who their parents are.  You see my life is hard, and I don't have English blood so people don't care about me for no reason.  I am not the only person in this world who could learn something from being taught a lesson.  Right now, I think they changed the heating/cooling thing in our house to make funny noises, in fact.  I can't tell, but it's bothering my eyes.  What do you got against me?  I can talk.  This is my life.  You have no right in this world to prolong ruining it.  I'm just saying in general, whoever presses the button.  I don't need to be taught a lesson.  What I say is true, and I am on the good side.  If you don't get that, you're in my way.  Can't any of you talk?  Get a BlogSpot!

So

How do I get rid of this double chin?  Is the rest of this sag fat??

In a Better Mood

but feel punished

I'm so sorry!  What can I do?  People just want to see black and white stripes.  They can't take the truth and talk.

Who Was That To? 8|

It was a general message to facets of different kinds of individuals.

Apology Again?

A thought came to my mind, not literally, but I thought people were deliberately trying to make me mad.  I dunno what to do.  It could happen again.  I didn't want it to.  I'm sure other people have these feelings.  My mom was acting all like she was so cool around me and I wasn't.  Like, it's the new thing she discussed with someone I hope feel we are worth it talking to.  She had messed up my face some.  People keep doing that since I missed Ellen a week, said I would, cuza appointments and keeping up with Sarah Brightman's concert online but mainly appointments I thought..  They've messed up my body before.  It must cause some anger.  It was just a passing thought while I was being tortured.  I don't like to be cornered like that..  What can I do?  Can anyone help?  I didn't do things like my dad in a bad way.  Me being fat is for other reasons.  Don't like k*** me!  I know people in Fort Lauderdale, some were like that, like think it's only about your measurements.  They were all hectic and clingy to one another, like they had something others didn't.  Anyone wanna counsel me?  Why are you quickly throwing raw thoughts at me like they don't matter and I can't say anything or else?  It's not a game and fun.  I don't think it's "gifted" to communicate like that.  You can do it, but it's not funny.  It's quite a spectacle.  So, I mean, I don't like it.  I think you're just doing it to punish me.  I can punish you.  You think I'm just a n*****.  You can't be like, what did she do now?  Everyone in real life knows I'm good.  Even my therapist who thinks I'm coocoo.  You aren't special to be mean to me instead.  You all have nothing to say.  Why?  Cuz yer up to no good.  You don't respect me.  You think my talents are a goof.  I ain't listenin' to ya.  Why can't you just be nice?

Story

There was a girl named Britainy Lee who was 16.  She wore a pink dress today with little white dots all over it and white pants underneath with white boots and a white hat.

She liked to walk along the stream where she lived and pick flowers and take them back to her own little cottage.  Her parents lived somewhere else.

There was a wonderful man there who was 22 whose name was Bryan Smith.  Other people abounded.  In fact, people were in mixed families.  Britainy was just mature.

So, she went to sit on the bank with the other girl who were observing the flowers and taking in the atmosphere.  A girl came to her who was 14 in a yellow dress.  They talked awhile, and it was a sweet exchange.

There was to be a journey.  All the girls were totally transformed, and the boys went along their merry way to make it a merry day.  Actually, they were waiting at night.  Some of the girls were playing, like London Bridges and dancing, like in class every day.  Some of the younger ones actually were sitting down huddled to themselves.  Britainy approached them and talked to them.  They smiled, and she then found them to be very happy.

The night was so dark and intense, and stars were beautiful.  It was actually rather warm, and it was very romantic to be there.  It was so magical in her mind, all the sites she took in.  She looked at the younger girls playing London Bridges.  They ran off and were talking and had fantasies, apparently.  She felt almost as if she were singing.  How glorious it was to think of singing in the big beautiful cathedral basilica made to worship the likes of God.

Choir

I don't think Chris Mann is a big choir person.. LOL!  I wonder what floats his boat?  Finding a wife?

I don't know about his choir experience.  The only boy?

What is it, now?

Trying to k*** off the Chinese?

:|  It came up in another corner of the world, something people probably all do.  Don't bother anyone else, but I'm pretty ferocious about people not talking to me.  Mua ha ha.  }:D  We shall see?  I see I have something in common with others now.  :D

It's a decision

to freak out.  No one should worry about anything.

Mad

No one is nice to me like when I was still growing up in high school.

Prayer

for my dad

I sent my parents an e-mail.

Feeling Sad

I wasn't trying to be mean to my dad, but I was mad at whoever did something to me, don't know who.  Should I guess?  Naw.  It was not cool.

If marriage were more than 2..

..I still don't wanna

I dunno tho that's what I believe in.  Order, tho, 1 2 3..

Did you notice that..

..the people on Ellen are all in a trance and stupe to her while they dance submissively and inferiorly in spirit?

Now what?

Composers around generally are embarrassed about their music?

We can't feel like a man if we perform?

If someone's messed up..

..then what was the reason for rubbing them in to me?

Issue

They keep trying to get on top of me after I've made a point.  Like they wanna f***.

I see..

..some people have changed their minds as to what they want in another person.

I actually stand for that.

I connect with nice people who look shitty from external factors.  I feel sorry for them.  When you see someone meek and humble and not that pretty but not like a disgusting look hopefully.  You know they deserved more.  If you see someone you admire, you can't say they're like nothing..you know, I get from my dad a look that's more like that mold of an English girl with bleached hair and a strong, supple look and attitude, tho I am from my mom more like a puppety look so I can't look like I get from my dad.  It gets in the way, actually.  I can't seem to establish a "look" for myself and need to in a way.

So

It's not like you go in like the devil and try to make someone all I wanted to be.  You give everyone what they want.  It's just what I thought when I was bombarded with a message to make someone else how I like and not me.  I'm not scared of nothin'.  Really, that is the solution.  Try to figure out how to make everyone equally happy.  Why should I sit here and take this and not whoever pressed the button?

Just look back at it.

All you see is rubbish thrown over me.

I am not bad now, but it's pretended.  Yes, it's to make other people feel better, some people probably need me to inform them.  I guess the point is I'm not to be treated like I'm some sort of traitor.  It's that people were throwing rubbish over me, and I tried to deal with it but didn't agree with it.  You all came in and did some things that are really inappropriate, that don't have anything to do with anyone else.  You told me I was just shit and called my dad shit.  Shit!?#$!&  *shit* croaks a frog.  (It's supposed to be funny, DUH!  My blog.  My funny.  Not tryin' to think of any one person.)  And whoever just did that I did not know.  I mean it was a message that sorta popped up in the lava or boiling mass of water.

Meaning

It is one way you can look at things, but really?  Maybe I'm like the sweet girls I see alone at the grocery store.

Problem

My dad spurted I wasn't better than anyone, was the same as everyone else, rudely, then said why because no one is.

Musik

Chris Mann is a little weird.  It's normal to be happy.  I am normal.

Retreat

People left behind the mageek (magic.)

Song

Like magic, when Chris Mann sings I can sing too the same way in Viva La Vida probably from that Music in college crap.

OK get this

You're in trouble if you don't know what you're doing and haven't ever developed any of your talents.

What a Thing

to talk about when you told me to leave the house because you can but act possessive over me as a person like a parent still when I'll be 30 in 2 years..

Perhaps, the decision has been finalized.  If so, if because of that.. I don't really get it, I was just talking out.  I may not be refined, but my life has been stolen and given to complaining other performers in Hollywood.

My Life

I don't care what you say, what you gossip.  (My dad I mean.  I forget what I meant.)

Weird

I couldn't get him to stop staring.

Problem

I am practicing Christine's role in The Phantom of the Opera to make a CD of it.  I didn't do anything, and my dad seemed to say that I couldn't be in a performance of it.  Why say that like a punishment?  Yes, I might audition.

My "Shit List" or My Bad List

No one is on my bad list..?  Um..I can imagine things I hate more than what a murderer would present to me as his or her personality.

"You're gonna miss me when I'm gone.. when I'm gone.."

Don't worry about me until Friday morning or maybe evening/night.

I don't feel psyched to being in trouble.

Something wrong with the guy.

My dad is acting a bit off because something went astray at a certain time.

I was tricked.

They want me to think I am the best person in the world.  They want me to know I'm not but believe I am loved enough.

How could you do this

to an innocent girl who is always good?  Like, oh, I think she has to be rubbed in to dads born in 1950 in a way that is uncomfortable to her.  That's a decision, not a reaction, it's a decision about who I am to tip me over.

I don't get it, yet!

I already try to keep to myself and not be an animal, too.  My friends left me.

I don't understand.

I'm paying back for my past physically.

No Hope

I was dieting, but I had something else yesterday, not too bad.  No one likes me for my race and how I look.  My computer speakers aren't working.  I was trying an exercise video.

IMDb - The Soapbox

Why are gay people so gay?

A topic was right on here, recently. Gay people are excited about being gay, and it doesn't seem to stop.

People just know you're supposed to marry, but I don't believe in that, anymore.

Don't get me wrong, I am happy for any hetero/homo couple/group. I just feel that marriage is like an abortion. It's giving up your friends forever and not realizing you will be tired of that boy or girl. The only reason there seems to be is to have babies together.

I will never give up believing in a successful life for being with only 1 person. Maybe, my dad likes that, but that's him. My mom wanted to do something with children but was told to leave. She seems to be being babied by older people.

This is a lot like people being disappointed in Tim Burton and Johnny Depp having kids with girlfriends.

I can only dig in further to say they want to preserve their status as Late Boomers and have their own kids rather than other people's.

I sense more weird feelings.

Trying to get me to get an o***** punishing me for little things that don't count.

Obesity

I know people don't like me for not having a perfect figure.

Being Suggestive

They won't stop bothering me!

Problem

I keep getting little surprises, like rubbing in if I lied now.

Anyway

Yes, I mean, I keep a blog, and some things were interesting.

Like

They just watched me e-mail, and I'm taking it silently.  I don't know why they'd want to do that, anyway.  No one likes what they do.

I don't understand..

..when people tell me to think about someone else for a change and not myself.  I mean, is something the matter, it's always about everyone else?

What I Need to Do

I need to make sure my dad is still happy.  I don't feel anyone loves me.  I don't see why in such a spirit I am watched and like people wonder about what I say.

I told my dad he was lying that they were nice to me and it sounded right and he was saying to leave right now and got closer until I took it back.  What if I had a disability?  I'd rot.  :(  Prayers to all who rot.  It should not be.  Those lousy old homes and the homeless.  But yes, no one cares if I "rot in Hell."

"The Low Down"

Not everyone is interested in what I have to say, but some people are in this..

My psychiatrist was like yelling with my mom and I.

Today, my mom was like punishing me for it and ended up yelling.

My dad did, too.

bc

he's a lot like me, I've lived where he's lived..

Tired?

Are you tired of Johnny Depp?

Issue

They just keep arguing back like it's okay.  I have nothing to live for now that I'm out of school.  It is not time for me to start a family.

Problem

I don't think it's very smart to be mean to me in private when you make me mad.

My Rep

Everyone said I was good, too good, too shy, etc., etc.

Why now can someone come along and pick at me for if I get upset in the home but didn't do anything wrong?  Why was I fatter??

I'm tired of sitting here accepting things silently.  It gets to me.

Lucky

I just feel lucky or happy I wasn't so upset before.  I have nothing and no one to turn to.  Even by myself, people watch me and get back.

Problem

I keep getting tagged at for oh you just were upset at this now don't relax.

I don't care about you all anyway

Everyone in this world .. well the ones I know .. are racist!  I don't need to be sorry for anything nor trapped by anyone's words.

In My Room Alone

These people keep being mean to me and hurting me with what they can say when they watch me.  My life and the world has become nothing, and some people don't care!

Trapped

I want these people to leave my life be.

If I ask if my parents are being mean or lying they yell and stuff.

I know no one likes me.

They keep doing weird things to me, and I can't escape.

Someone keeps having weird things done to me if something happens naturally that's like getting upset.

I just want to relax!

Apology

I'm truly sorry for how I've been thinking, but it was just something that was bothering me.  Not that you'd know.

Famous People Are Pigs Today

Slowly, my resources are dwindling.

Problem

I don't want people to be mean to me cuza my dad.

Problem

They keep annoying me!

They keep doing stuff to me saying it's for something I've done in the past.  It's been a few years.

Don't some people

just really make life a drag?  Why not go for the high points or let me?  I told you I can't seem to get these things out of my life.  No one's perfect.  Okay, right now they won't stop bothering me.  These noises keep happening in my room that they do.  Like I said, they keep holding onto the past, like if I feel upset.  I didn't do anything wrong.

I know what it is.

The medicine I'm taking is making me lethargic.  I have to move out 1st if I don't wanna take it.  My psychiatrist even makes me keep it cuza that.  He said I could see another 1, but now he says no one will get me off it.  I'd have to just monitor it myself and live somewhere else since the doctor will prescribe it to me.

Problem

I feel so bombarded with people attacking me and telling me I did something back that I don't feel like doing anything.

The truth comes out.

I bet people would believe other people and not me.  I know what I'm doing I think as I go along.  Who does?

I should be going on with my life

but I'm distraught over what people are gonna say to me knowing what kinda thing's been going on with me.

Problem

I keep getting barged in on and bothered.  People are mean to me, and I "can't" be mean back.  You think I'm not worth it cuza my age.  You also don't get that it's funny when someone curses on their own blog.  I only have to worry about handing out my blog to people if I work with them cuza things like the Facebook conspiracies.  I admit I wasn't behaving perfectly, but I was treated like I was a big mess.  I feel a bit inhibited and that I'm on medicine I should not take, like it's not for anything I have wrong and therefore is said to be a danger.  I don't understand, are the jogs and situps not enough?

Problem

Why are people acting like I have one?

Upset

People keep being inappropriate and unaware to me.

I'm also bothered by the people who are always watching me in private.  Why?   How will you stop?

If Not

They're still in their lives.

Every Good Boy Does Fine

Older adults are supposed to give good young people what they want.  Maybe, most are on a guilt trip.  As far as generation goes, with how we're treated we're not happy always by 1 generation.

Probem

These people keep being mean to me if they don't like what I do.

Nite

Story

There was a girl whose name was Judy LooLoo.  She was an ordinary human girl.  Her hair was a neat goldish blonde.  Her eyes were a crystally aqua color.  Her hair curled in ringlets.  She was 13.

There was a boy named Peter who was 20 who seemed very kind to her in an older ballpark range of an age.  He had fair brown hair and twinkling blue eyes.

They lived in a city.  Things were almost magical there.

There was a big house where they lived.  There were many lively, beautiful, fit and slender ladies there.  The men were in and out.  Most were in their late 20s and early 30s.  The ones in their 40s were very wise, and there were also many who were in their 50s, 60s, and 70s.

Judy was alone and didn't feel like crocheting.  Peter came along and said, "Hello, and what are you up to?"

"I'm not up to anything," and she weeped longingly.  She was in a grayish blue substantial dress.  He gave her a hug and held her closely.  Evening came, and she ate her supper and then got ready for bed, stayed up to post on her blog and talk to some friends on her computer, which was covered in rubber with a strong screen, like shark tank glass at an aquarium.  It would not break.  It is a surprise how careless and silly people can be, but she never seemed to have any problems.

There was to be a big journey.  Everyone came and many walked and some rode in covered wagons.  Finally, they reached their destination, and the big crowd were all happy.

A little boy about 7 became a bit rowdy yet somewhat playful.

It was a festivity.  Judy had fun running around by herself in her half up pigtails.

They all went back.  She went out to sit on the bank in the evening.  Other girls were there who were about 7 or 8.  They looked longingly at the water.  Judy played that she was a pirate.  She ran around despite her demeanor around them.  She wa in a white lace dress, nothing in her hair nor on her head.

Peter came and told her they could go away together on a boat.  She gave him a big smile and agreed.  The pirate ship came in, and Peter shouted, "Argh, matey's!"  They got in.  Judy swabbed the deck.  The ride was nice.  Judy lay in her bunk against her pillow, and Peter came to talk to her.

They landed in Spain.  There was black and red all around.  They found a gold cathedral, as well, with beautiful artwork and celestial music like they'd never heard.  Peter picked up Judy and they proceeded to the organ where she tried to play.  Her feet did not reach the pedals, so Peter gave it a shot and it sounded grand.  He could play little learning pieces and gave it a hand.  The organ was so beautiful.  Judy turned on the chimes and she giggled to herself.

They scurried back to the ship finally and again they were off.  This time they landed in southern Canada and met some indians.  They went further north and found snow wolves, which were elegant creatures.  They speared fish, which was delicious.  Judy was not used to this cold and had to bundle up.  She eventually went back home.  Peter finally came back, too.

It was time for school to start up.  She did well in school.  She was now in high school, taking high school courses.  She decided to transfer to an arts school to learn musical theater dance.  It was a lot of ballet and jazz.  At night, her singing would make her feel better.  In the end, she graduated and got a certificate and became a pro and starred in a musical mainly as a dancer but with good singing parts.  She eventually got married to a boy from Finland and they had a beautiful baby boy and girl.  The girl's hair had very fair and abundant highlights and her eyes were a deep light crystally blue.  The girl's name was Judy, too.  She grew to be a shapely young girl with a supple figure and her hair was very luscious and sparkly.

Guy

link

Who wouldn't like him?  He seems very interesting.

Olso in Norway and not at the very bottom but a part of a landmass chunk I think.

Performance Artist

Andrew Lloyd Webber - CATS with Grizabella, new video coming!

Not Right

It's not right! to make fun of people for not being famous.  I'm just saying that a lot of things aren't!  Not to pick on this example!  :D  i.e. I am not sarcastic.

TV

Ellen seemed to be cheery.  The lady I saw 1st was nice.  Very friendly and smart and to the fact.  The dude was so cool.  His brunette daughter with dark black fluffy hair, dark like him but light skin, was so smart looking.  The soldier at the end was so kind, as well, and represented the forces well.  He seemed to feel guilty for being in the military, injured.  I wanted to be in in some way, but I'm trying to promote my art/performing, instead.  My other dream was to be a successful millionaire.

TV

Time for some Ellen!

Trap

That's it.  Now, is anyone normal out there not afraid to talk to me now??

Violence

I feel death threats.  What a pity!

I just said no.

You have to know that even if you know something others don't, there are things you really don't know that others do, as well.  One of them is the fact that you aren't "perfect."  This is my creed.

Bossiness

What do you think of people telling other people what to do?

Story

There was a girl named Abby Gale, and she was a young maiden of 14.  She had a 15-year-old sister named Tracy Gale.  Abby had light blonde highlights, and Tracy had dark red hair.  She was courting a guy of 19 who was a strong farmer and shopkeeper.  They were still in school.  Their teacher was also 15.  They lived in a town by the woods where the adult men would hunt for food.

1 day, a ship docked in the harbor.  It said it would take them away if they wished.  Abby went, and there were many ladies and men there in their 20s and wise older ones in their late 30s.

Abby sat down on a chair, and next to her appeared a man of 20 who took her hand and spoke with words of love.

She spent her time in the folksy music that they played and danced to.  In a week, they arrived at a destination.  A lighthouse was seen in the distance.  They all stayed near the lighthouse, relieved to get off the ship.  Abby was taken upstairs by the man she met, and a girl of 19 followed.  Together, they looked out and enjoyed the setting there.  It gave her a spooky feeling.  It was cool and breezy, and the man, whose name was Theodore, put his arms around her.  He had flaxen hair himself.  He was a romantic dude.  Then, a man old enough almost to be her father was there and smiled wide and accepted her in.  She fell asleep with the older girls, curled up cozy as a dog.

Night fell, morning followed, the next day. ~ *

"Oh no," said Abby, "I'm so frightened."  A girl of 20 put her arm around her and cuddled with her awhile.  They connected well.

They all were to go on a trip.  Snow fell.  Abby was given some warm wraps to bundle up in.  They were on a sojourn or what seemed rather like a crusade.  The women all laughed, and then men were all strong.  They all stopped for Abby and gave her some fish they speared in the creek.

Finally they reached their destination at the Sydney Opera House Magnificent!

They all went inside.  Abby was lifted to a higher place.  A show turned on.  The same man came back, Theodore, and gave her some concessions.

"Oh my," she said, and this time she cuddled into Theodore who held her to him..  "I cannot imagine being happy for very long, as though one day I must die.."  She wept.

It was time to go.

They all left and got in a caravan.

They reached a dock again, and people were dancing to folk music by the sea who lived there, mostly in their 30s and 40s.

Finally, they reached another town, and Abby was treated to a birthday dinner and had some wonderful cake!!  It was better than any drug.

They all got in a plane and flew.  Abby was scared on the plane.  Theodore was able to comfort her.

They landed in a land of ice sculptures.  The people were all with black hair and pale skin.  They had raw fish.  They got on a ship majestic and sailed off to another land.

It was an undiscovered or new island.  There were pretty buildings.  There was a large one where they all were to live for now.  Later, they moved to a palace.  Abby was helped up to her own, nice, cozy, sparkling partly room.  She looked out and could see the sea.

There was a merry celebration and she went and had fun, the frail young girl.  She danced a long time and glowed.

The rulers came to meet them, and Abby was made an angel fairy.  The king would feature her with his women.  She had a beautiful sparkling lilacy bluish dress and a white hat.

..these people

won't stop threatening my parents when I do something they don't agree with.  I don't agree with them.

My Eye/s

feeling harder in the back

I can sing real pop, too.

Any basic genre.

I can sing.

It's easy to others, like Chris Mann and Christina Aguilera.  I could have blew the world away if I sang that on The Voice with no help.

Will this person

always be in a fight with me in private and not let me get anything I earn/deserve/can have?  Like a normal relationship?

What I Noticed

People are rubbing in they like people like my old best friends being trashy over me.

I don't

give a shit about you people affecting how I am treated like you cuz yer a danger to nice people.

Help!

Someone is trying to kill me.  My body parts are being monitored and disturbed.  My psychiatrist did it for this person, kept twitching his eyes and they feel like they're severed in some way, feel pressure back there..  I just told him I didn't want the meds, I'm 18+.  My mom will kick me out if I don't take it! and he keeps giving it to me!  My mom is sick, and we'd been arguing.

Problem

You can't keep coming in and ruining my life.  So what if I did something wrong?  I was just cursing about the noises in my room, tho much wrong was done.  If it's time to move on, then it's time to freakin' move on!

Oh, oh no!

It was just this.

What's this?

Submitting to people who are confused and mean to me all the time?

So, what's this?

I'm so good and people are piping in to contribute to punish me?  Please don't get mad at me for what inspired me to post this..  Do you deserve to be comfortable?  What about me!?